Tag: wisdom

What constitutes a good woman?

The culture of today may think how a person looks or what their net worth is makes a good woman. But I can assure you it does not. No one is good except God but each one of us has the potential to have good character.

I believe a woman of quality character is more valuable than wealth. One who is honest, loyal, has integrity, humility, hardworking and puts God first is more valuable than a priceless gem. I asked my husband what he thought a good woman was he said a Proverbs 31 woman like you. Thank you, Roger.

You can have good character and not love God but when God is first there is a grace of inner beauty that cannot be compared to. The bible talks about such a woman in Proverbs 31:10-31. King Lemuel’s words came from what his mother taught him. She spoke with words of wisdom and words for finding a virtuous wife. We all can look at this passage of scripture and glean from her wisdom. But whether your single or married you can be a virtuous woman. A woman of excellent character.

In verse 30 it says, “Charm is deceitful, and beauty is passing, but a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised.” So often we put pressure on ourselves about appearance and God looks more at our hearts. God chose David based on his heart and not his appearance it is the same for us.

There is nothing wrong in taking care of yourself it is healthy to do so. Plus, there is nothing wrong in wearing makeup, jewelry, getting your nails done etc. I think the point I’m making is all those things are good although not what is it that makes your character have value.

Your value is derived from God and your character shows in your actions, that is based in your heart, beliefs and thoughts. Out of our heart flows the issues of life the bible says. In Matthew 15:18-19 Jesus said “But those things which proceed out of the mouth come from the heart, and they defile a man. For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies.”

Good character could be developed through conscious genuine effort in, one allowing God to change our character deficits and two by allowing humility, work ethics, relationships to work out our rough edges. Sometimes we want others to change but we forget to let God change us first.

As a woman I know that we try not to let the world around us affect us but as a woman I know the battle to keep peace of mind is real. I choose to speak the Word of God to the things that try to rob my peace and keep my mind on God. In a world of comparisons, it may be difficult to not do a comparison to others. Comparing yourself to somebody else is a trick of the enemy because God created you unique, and one of kind. You do not need to be like anyone else. Compare your character to Jesus He will work on making you Christlike.  

As a woman I know it does help not to wear my emotions on my sleeve and to look at situations with faith and not fear. Yes, it’s easier said than done but when you mediate on Gods word it flows out of your inner man and comes forth out of your mouth. He fights our battles. I have learned to trust God over my emotions, thoughts and body. Every day brings new challenges for women and men but through Christ we are overcomers.

Whether you know that or not you have an unseen enemy and God’s Son who is the living Word won the battle for you. So, allow Him to help you as you go along your day. It’s time to enjoy being the woman God created you to be.    

Strengths and Weaknesses…

Accepting your strengths and strengthening your weakness.  Our strengths are the things we are good at or excel in and we usually enjoy.  Strengths can also be things that come naturally to you.  If you take for granted your strengths, you won’t grow in them.  It’s always beneficial to sharpen your skills and strengths.  Supporting your own strengths and improving them makes you more productive and satisfied. 

Weaknesses can be strengthened with knowledge and focused discipline but first one must recognize it’s a weakness.  Request for help can take you to the next phase-out of your weakness.  Such as, habitual tardiness that is the symptom of poor time management.  Learn what the sum of time you will need and don’t add to it.  Resist adding to the list before going somewhere.

I love preaching, teaching and counseling.  Doing this blog is a form of strengthening a weakness because grammar and spelling are not my strengths.  But when I took the plunge and researched about blogs, I decided to conquer my hesitation/fear that I wouldn’t be able to do this.  Here we are four months later I’m grateful for this opportunity.

I think practical action helps one to achieve.  To try new things helps our brains to stay healthy.  This also helps our self-esteem and achievements build our esteem.  It is a good feeling to try something and to finish it.  Perfectionism stands in the way of trying new things.  Remember everybody fails at something but success is back-up and trying again.

I’m still learning about and trying new things.  I have still not figured out how to make the category with this blog, but I chose to keep trying and if it is necessary, spending the money to get the help I need.

It’s wisdom when we’re stuck to seek help.  Wither it is at writing or your personal mental health living in the same patterns only stops the increase psychologically, emotionally, physically.  Even spiritually growing is good.

Try something new, read a book, change your workout routine, call that person that you were thinking about, rise and fortify your weaknesses and embrace your strengths.

Simplifying life

How do we simplify life?  What does a simplified life mean?

Having wisdom is essential to having a healthy simplified life.  To me a simplified life is straightforward, made easier in addressing life’s issues and simple in understanding what to do when you need to do it.  Wisdom is essential to a simplified life.   

In Proverbs 4:5-9 states, “Get wisdom! Get understanding! Do not forget, nor turn away from the words of my mouth.” 6) “Do not forsake her, and she will preserve you.  Love her, and she will keep you. 7) Wisdom is the principal thing; Therefore, get wisdom.  And in all your getting, get understanding. 8) Exalt her, and she will promote you; She will bring you honor, when you embrace her. 9) She will place on your head an ornament of grace, A crown of glory she will deliver to you.”

Wisdom helps us to simply life because with wisdom is the knowledge to know the right plan of action.  Running from problems complicates situations and life. 

I saw this meme on Facebook not sure who designed it but it’s relevant for a simplified lifestyle.

  “Don’t Complicate Life”

Missing someone         Call

Wanna meet up?          Invite

Have questions          Ask

Don’t like something    Say it

Like something          State it

Want something          Ask

Love someone            Tell them

I think this meme is powerful because it makes it simple.  Wisdom is available to anyone who asks.  The bible says God gives wisdom generously to those who ask for it and believes he will give it. 

If you need help ask, if you miss someone call them, if you want to do something invite someone to do it with you, if you don’t like something say it tell the person.  How can someone change if they don’t know what they do bothers you. 

Obviously, this doesn’t mean blast someone in anger. Living the simplified life means you speak up so that you’re not blasting in anger.  Anger is a secondary emotion which means when we are angry there is something underneath the anger such as hurt, fear or frustrations.  Allow your self to let God show you what you’re really feeling instead of just anger.

You too can choose to live a simplified life.

Why is knowledge power?

You’ve heard it said, “knowledge is power.”  But why is knowledge power?  Where do you go for help?

Do you first seek out a person?  Or do you run to God in prayer first and he directs you to a person, information etc…

We are facing dealing with the crawlspace repair.  The amount of money it cost would almost wipe out our savings.  So, do you wipe out your savings or do you use an equity line?

These were just a few questions we had that we were unsure of.  We prayed for wisdom.  Then I called a friend who is an assessor and is very good at budgeting.  She gave us quality advice based on facts.  We also had gone to our bank and talked to the manager before I got to talk to my friend and she also gave us the same advice based in facts.

We talked to a refinance person and got the same information.  Their knowledge helped us to make a quality decision based in facts.

If your help comes from people, make sure they are qualified to give you unbiased knowledgeable answers.  Which means “not opinion” but facts based on truth because if it’s not based in truth it’s not a fact.

I prefer to ask God to help who has all the wisdom.  He led us to call a friend, go to the bank etc. 

Psalm 121:1-2 “I will lift up my eyes to the hills-From whence comes my help?  2) My help comes from the LORD, who made heaven and earth.”

With the information we have we now can decide the best option for us based in facts and our situation.

Knowledge is power because with knowledge comes the power of good decision making.

Treasure Hunters

I love to watch anything about treasure hunting.  The mystery of where is it and how did it get lost fascinates me.

What do you treasure most?  Have you ever thought about the treasures of your heart/soul?  Maybe your wondering what are those treasures?  Some are attitudes, desires, thoughts, values…  this list comes from the book ‘Boundaries in Marriage’ by Dr. H. Cloud and Dr. J. Townsend.  We are responsible for our own treasures.     

What do you consider to be a treasure?  We only have control over our selves such as our abilities to be happy, smile, think, investigate, choices, decisions etc. they are ours.

In the above-mentioned book, it discusses relationships and boundaries.  Healthy relationships don’t complete each other they complement each other.

There is a chapter in the book called “It takes two to make One.”  They state, “Complementing each other means bringing different perspectives, talents, abilities, experiences and other gifts to the relationship and forming a partnership.”

I love that statement because it forces couples to look beyond the statements of, they fulfill me and makes them think about what they bring to the relationship.

They also state in the book, “Completing each other means making up for one’s immaturity as a person.”  Marriage is meant to be a 100-100% going into marriage based on the other person making up your immaturity doesn’t produce a healthy relationship.  We each are responsible for our own character. 

Here are just a few abilities we each must have that are basic human requirements. “They are the ability to: learn and grow, have initiative and drive, say no, be vulnerable and share feelings, grieve, be sexual, be spiritual, be free and not controlled by external or internal factors.”  I recommend reading the book, ‘Boundaries in Marriage.’

If your completeness is dependent on another you will constantly be looking for something, they can’t give you.  Only you can do the work needed to build your esteem and character. 

Boundaries are where you start and stop.  Knowing your own boundaries helps you to choose your responses.  These areas of our life if we don’t evaluate and decide our responses then you’re going to feel overwhelmed.

Making a hard conversation that could back-fire isn’t easy but not addressing an issue is even harder to live with.

I like to have couples that I have worked with look at this list and write what it means to them.  Because we are responsible for our own treasures.  “Your feelings, attitudes, behaviors, choices, limits, desires, thoughts, values, talents, and love are aspects of your soul.”  Owning your own treasures brings value to your relationships.

The bible describes wisdom as a valuable treasure.  Wisdom gives us the ability to process the knowledge we have with the right choice.  God’s word also tells us that if we ask, God will give us wisdom generously.  To me wisdom is a great and valuable treasure.  

Proverbs 8:10 “For wisdom is better than rubies and all the things one may desire cannot be compared with her.”

Knowing what to do when you need to do it is wisdom.  Start looking at the treasures of your soul and you will begin to understand about yourself and this helps us give from what we have.

I know my identity is in Christ.  He has built me to be healthier and more confident in him and in my life.  To me Jesus is the Wisdom of God.  He will help you look at the treasures of your soul and help you grow in complementing your spouse.