thoughts – Practical Insights, by Dr. Annette

My Lifes Journey through 2023-24

scenic view of the forest during sunrise

On Jan 26^th, 2023, I was in an accident. I had my head turned while my friend was driving. We were hit from behind in a roundabout. I developed whiplash. I had pain and tightness in my neck & back of my head. Went through four months of physical therapy. Which is why I stopped writing. Looking down was very painful.

That started off the year, thankfully, pt helped, and God used that experience to teach me the value of rest. Then, at the end of May, I started looking at homes on Zillow in a different area. Being on staff at church and my husband on the worship team, it made sense to move, plus we both wanted to be closer to our friends & church.

We found a home that met the requirements we talked about. We called our realtor, who was wonderful in helping us through the process. Although it took two months to get an offer on our house. We finally got a cash offer with a closing in three weeks. Our friends helped us pack and move an entire house. Approximately 3000sq ft home into a 1520 sq ft with a basement. There was no time to decide what to give or throw away, but God was with us the whole way with all the stress of ups & downs of selling and moving a home. We moved in August 2023.

I had been feeling tired more than I ever have. My theory has always been pushing through no matter how you feel. It has worked for me up until this year.
Although I’ve lived with pain all my life, this year felt different. I felt exhausted, which is not me. I blamed it on packing & moving, menopause & my thyroid. In May, before the move, I had a biopsy on a mole come back basal cell, but with moving, I put the surgery off until October 11th. The basal tumor was on my chest they removed it and sent it off to pathology. After two weeks of stitches and on the removal day, I was told pathology found something, and they needed to do more smears. Oh, ok. No big deal. I have had basal cell cancer three times now, so it wasn’t a big deal.

I was supposed to get a mammogram in May, too, but I put it off. I have been putting it off for four years. So, since my pathology report was taking time, I thought it was ok to get your mammogram & bone density done. So, my appointment was Nov. 7th Mammogram came back enlarged left lymph nodes, so they scheduled an ultrasound, no big deal I have had that before.
Ultrasound showed 4 suspicious malignancy meaning (very suspicious). As the radiologist was talking, I let her know I was waiting for the pathology report on the basal tumor removed. They scheduled a lymph node biopsy for Nov 30th. The next day after the ultrasound, I contacted the dermatologist, Dr., who removed the small tumor. It came back as lymphoma but due to the small amount of tissue they could not determine what type.

Being clueless I said so that means then it is not cancer. But I was wrong. It is cancer. Two days later, I got a call from the skin Dr asking me to please make an appointment with a hematologist/oncologist. I was going to wait but my daughter who works for my family practitioner also was insistent.
The oncologist office would have seen me on Nov 20th but I wanted to wait till the biopsy was done.

Nov 30th, I had the left lymph node biopsy they took 4 biopsy’s and left a sand size titanium marker. My appointment with Dr. S was Dec 4th. My daughter didn’t go because we didn’t think he would have any reports. But he did he had contacted the pathologist who gave him a preliminary report. Yes, it is a low-grade (slow growing) lymphoma B-cell.
Dr S. ordered a Pet-scan, which was Dec 11th.

The pet scan showed it in my neck, chest, abdomen, and pelvis.
My appointment with Dr. S was scheduled for the 18th, but I called, and they saw me on the 13th. The cancer is Lymphoplasmacytic Lymphoma called Waldenstrom Macroglobulinemia. He said it was stage 3b. He ordered a 24-hour urine test and a bone marrow biopsy, which was on January 8^th, 2024.

The bone marrow biopsy came back with either marginal zone lymphoma or lymphoplasmacytic lymphoma. The Dr believes it is Lymphoplasmacytic lymphoma because my biopsy from the lymph node had enough tissue to get a specific diagnosis. My treatment is Bendka and Rituxan. Two times every four weeks for six months. But first a Port Cath was put in on Jan 31st and my first treatments were Tuesday Feb 6th and 7th. Today I am doing well just a few side effects. I have a great support system of family, friends and Church.

I know God will bring me through this and heal my blood & lymph nodes from cancer. Thankfully, it is not in my organs. With all that said I would encourage you to trust God in whatever situation you are walking through. I believe in miracles and healing. I know He promises in His word Isaiah 43 tells me he will get me through to the other side. We do not always know all the answers of why, but we can learn to trust God to provide and help us through whatever it is we face.

Since I started this post in Jan it is now July 2024 and God brought me through treatments I ended treatment the beginning of May. Thankfully, I only had to do 4 months of treatment to be in remission. Trusting God through it all.

How does fear affect you and how to overcome it?

Fear can be rational or irrational. It can debilitate when left unchecked. Fear that is irrational becomes phobias. Some fear is normal and healthy. It is wisdom to recognize when a situation is compromised such as walking down an alley that is dark and unknown.

Fear as a noun means “an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat.” Similar words dread, panic, worry, angst, anxiety, unease… Fear as a verb “be afraid of (someone or something) as likely to be dangerous, painful, or threatening.”

Fear is a heightened sense of danger. How we respond to it and what we do with it can help us to overcome the emotion or give in to it. Our emotions are connected to our thoughts and our hearts and mind are also connected. The emotion of fear causes a fight or flight response. “The fight or flight response is an automatic physiological reaction to an event that is perceived as stressful or frightening. The perception of threat activates the sympathetic nervous system and triggers an acute stress response that prepares the body to fight or flee.” Quote from Psychology Tools.com

Therefore, you think of something and instantly feel it. That is a powerful statement because when we can control our thoughts, we then can control our emotions.

Emotions can be triggered without a thought but then the thoughts come. For example, I’m looking at flowers as I’m typing, and it makes me smile with joy then I thought of the friend who gave them to me. It is a beautiful spring day, winter has left, and the joy of sunshine fills our house. For me that gives me thoughts of spring cleaning and making a list of chores that need to be done inside along with the outside work. If I was dreading the chores those thoughts would cause me stress and then those thoughts would lead to procrastinate the chores. How we think effects outcomes.

If how we think effects outcomes, then working on thinking healthy thoughts would help us. God’s word tells to think on good things. But we need to remember that to do this we must give the things that cause fear, stress and anxiety to the Lord through prayer.

Philippians 4:6-8 “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; 7) and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. 8) finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if the there is anything praiseworthy-meditate on these things.”

Since we are looking at how fear affects us the answer is in the fight or flight response. When we take control of our thoughts with truths, we can make quality decisions on what is the best response for us to make. Learning to speak the truth to yourself is not just being positive because that can become toxic. Speaking the truth to yourself is speaking what is truth about the situation and according to God’s word.

How to Recognize and Defuse Anxiety…

Anxiety seems to be a word used often in the day and time we live in. So often now people say, ‘my anxiety.’ But we need to be empowered to reverse the anxiety so that it doesn’t just become who we are for the rest of our lives. What was once just passed over is now understood by its symptoms and that is important. People have anxiety for all kinds of reasons but there is help and hope for those who suffer with it.

First, what is anxiety? “Intense, excessive, and persistent worry and fear about everyday situations. Fast heart rate, rapid breathing, sweating, and feeling tired may occur.” Quote Mayo Clinic These are just some of the symptoms.

‘There is a normal anxiety that most people get before public speaking or taking a test.’ “Anxiety is only an indicator of underlying disease when feelings become excessive, all consuming, and interfere with daily living.” Quote Mayo Clinic I recommend if you are suffering with excessive and all-consuming anxiety it is time to seek professional help. You are valuable to God there is no shame in getting professional help.

Since an anxious mind is a fearful mind, we can look at it with the understanding that fear is at the root cause of anxiousness. When we allow our mind to stay fixed and focused on the situations of what ‘could be or won’t be’ it can become all consuming. This blog post is meant to help you recognize your thoughts and symptoms. And teach you how to change your thoughts so that you stop the worry and fear before it overcomes you. Fear is sneaky it waits and pounces when we least expect it. “Fear is an unpleasant feeling triggered by the perception of danger, real or imagined.” Anxiety and fear have the fight or flight response. When in real danger fleeing is recommended. Our feeling of situations can distort our thinking and responses. That is why healthy self-talk can figure out if it is real or imagined.

The bible speaks a lot about fear and anxious thoughts. So from the word of God we can learn how to recognize, replace and overcome anxious thoughts. There are also healthy tools to help us to calm our emotions when anxious.

These two scriptures I speak to calm my mind when anxiety has tried to take over. Isaiah 26:3 NKJ “You will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on You, because he trusts in You.” Keeping our eyes on Jesus who is the author and perfector of our faith is essential to keeping a calm mind. This means we rely and depend on Christ sacrifice to provide us with the peace He gave us. When we trust God to watch over us we can keep our focus on Him and not on what we think will happen. Assuming what will happen is just an assumption it is not a fact.

Philippians 4:6-8 “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; 7) and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. 8) Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy-meditate on these things.” Meditate equals think on these things.

I love this scripture because it reminds us to think on things that are good, and of a good report when the anxious negative thoughts abound, refuse them in Jesus’ name and replace them with the word of God and anything good, pure, and lovely. We can choose our thoughts!

Deep breathing slowly in and out slowly helps to release the toxins of stress, anxiety and fear which can make our bodies sore and tired. Understanding and recognizing the symptoms of stress, anxiety, and fear you experience helps to control your thoughts and emotions. Being aware of these helps to calm ourselves down quicker. Dr. Daniel G. Amen wrote in is book ‘Healing Anxiety and Depression’ “Whenever you feel anxious, mad, or tense, take a deep breath, hold it for four to five seconds, then slowly blow it out (take about six to eight seconds to blow out).” He says, “do this about ten times.” I find this helpful for me when I am also frustrated over a situation it helps calm me down and refocus my thoughts.

Dr. Carolyn Leaf in her book ‘Who Switched off my Brain’ said “A thought may seem harmless, but if it becomes toxic, even just a thought can become physically, emotionally, or spiritually dangerous. Thoughts are measurable and occupy mental ‘real estate.’ Thoughts are active; they grow and change. Thoughts influence every decision, word, actions and physical reaction we make.” You can refuse negative, unhealthy thoughts sometimes we have to say No I’m not thinking that!

2 Corinthians 10:3-5 “For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war according to the flesh. 4) For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, 5) casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ.”

This scripture shows that we can take authority in Christ over our thoughts. Truly the battle is won or lost in our minds. We have the choice to think what we want don’t accept every thought that comes to your mind. Strongholds are built in our mind one thought (unchecked) at a time. Be aware of what you are thinking do not give the anxious negative thoughts free rein in your mind because it will build a stronghold in the mind.

Stronghold thinking patterns can produce stress, fear and anxiety also. Once again if you have excessive and all consuming anxiety, it is time to seek professional help. You are valuable to God there is no shame in getting professional help.

Some proactive steps to take: Exercise is a helpful tool to reduce stress, and it is healthy for us along with eating healthy foods. Processed foods poison our bodies system so when you can avoid processed foods. We use Juice Plus and vitamins to help our body’s immune system. Drink water it’s not my favorite but it is essential for our bodies. Finding time to get alone with God and pray and meditate on the word will also help reduce stress, anxiety etc.

I thank God that He is with us and has given us everything we need for life and godliness. Jesus’ sacrifice paid the price for our salvation and in that is healing, deliverance, joy and peace.

How to stand up for yourself when facing toxic positivity. by Laura Herrera

Last week in the “How to recognize toxic positivity” article, we learned how it affects our relationships with others and with ourselves. Also, how it spills into our relationship with God. This week we are learning what healthy positivity is and how to stand up for ourselves. How we can grow in our love for ourselves and in our intimacy with God.

As a recap, toxic positivity is shaming in disguise. It covers and stifles the vulnerability one shares with another or with themselves. In turn, it can cause one to believe that their needs and what they are going through are not worthy to be heard or helped in any manner. It also dispels hope.

A few common toxic phrases we learned were: Well, at least you do not have it as bad as…. It could be worse…. It will all be fine… Don’t worry about it…. Always look on the bright side… You’ll get over it… Stay positive…. Everything happens for a reason…

How to stand up for yourself and guard your heart:

If we open up to someone and the way, they respond is affecting us – we can either respectfully correct them or guard our heart.

What is guarding your heart? One way we guard our heart is speaking the truth to ourselves.

Affirm ourselves that what we are going through matters and unfortunately, they were not an emotionally safe person to confide in. Believe and trust God someone else will be a safe place. Affirming ourselves is an expression of showing love towards ourselves.

If we choose to speak up, we can say something like, “I know it was meant well, but it makes me feel as if what I’m going through doesn’t matter. Right now, I need support. Support for me right now means… (Share what needs you have). At the very least, we may just want a hug at that moment.

Food for thought: Many of us are afraid of confrontation. However, it is in the context of healthy confrontation that relationships can grow and flourish. If we do not speak up, the other person doesn’t know what we are feeling, and they do not have the opportunity to listen and make a positive change.

If it is us who are speaking toxic phrases over ourselves, we no longer must push our needs down. It is time to embrace ourselves with loving kindness.

Healthy positivity statements:

“I will take a step back and look for what I can be grateful for, but I will not diminish the needs that I have at this moment.”

What are my needs in this situation? Whether it be emotional, spiritual, or financial.

I am a child of God and He cares for me. I am not going through this alone. He cares for me because I’m His child.

Healthy positivity supplies hope:

Romans 8:28 NIV “And we know that for those who love God, all things work together for good to those that love the Lord and are called according to his purpose.”

This is the exact opposite of what some say with toxic phrases such as: “God only gives us what we can handle.” And “Everything happens for a reason.” (These are not even scriptural.)

God is not saying He put this on us. He also is not saying He caused this to happen to us, but He will be there with us through this. And He is working through this.

Isaiah 43: 1-3 NIV “But now, this is what the LORD says— He who created you, Jacob, He who formed you, Israel: “Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. For I am the Lord your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior;”

Romans 8:28 was key for me when I was fighting for 11 years to be heard by doctors. Thankfully, tenacity got me through it. It brought me through to keep seeking help. I was determined to find someone who could help me fight the diseases I was going through.

I knew no matter what, God could turn what I was going through and work something out for good. Years later after the diseases have been rooted out and I’ve healed emotionally, I now write for others going through chronic diseases.

Our relationship with God: God created us for a relationship with him, and more than anything He cares for every one of us. His word says,

Matthew 6:26 NIV “Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?” 1 Peter 5:7 NIV “Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.”

He’s telling you. He is not addressing another person. He is personally speaking to you.

Jesus is the perfect reflection of what care and comfort are. He values every one of us the same. We will not find a scripture where He compares what one person is going through with another. We will not find Him using any toxic positivity.

If He cares about each one of us and what we are going through, shouldn’t we as individuals follow suit and do the same for others and ourselves?

Are you someone who has believed the lie that I once did- “Am I not worthy of God’s care and affection?” Have you believed the lie, “He won’t hear my cries, so why even bother?”

If so, let today be the first day that you turn a corner and dwell on the truth. The truth is that He does care. We can go to Him and pour out our heart, pain, loss, fears, and frustrations- He will listen. When we are a child of God, He hears every word we speak.

Where many might have failed us and will fail us, we can take heart that what we are going through does matter to God. It matters greatly. Enter His presence without fear. He will not turn us down and He will not compare our situation to others. Let Him love on you and comfort you.

Psalm 34:18 NIV “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”

Now that I’m on a new journey of health and have received mental health coaching: I have been able to choose to either stand up for myself with the other people or guard my heart while affirming myself. I’ve been able find out who in my life are the real supporters that I can turn to and who are not. My relationship with God has blossomed. I confide in Him like never before. When I cry out to Him, I know I will be met with the sincerest comfort, love, and care. It doesn’t mean that I haven’t gone through other hurts or turmoil. On the contrary, I’ve been through a lot in the last few years in all kinds of areas of my life. However, I have now found peace and grace in asking myself, “What are my needs at this moment and what can I be grateful for?” I then have been able to turn to God for comfort, love, and support.

I want to leave you with this comforter analogy: When I think of Him comforting me in my troubles, I think of His embrace as an actual comforter. A comforter supplies warmth and covering to a cold body. Even though it can supply these things, it only does so when we reach out for it. Let Him comfort you. Reach out to Him for the comfort you need. Pour out your heart and He will be there wrapping His love and care on you.

I pray as you learn how to stand up for yourself and love yourself, that your relationships blossom. I pray your relationship with God grows like never before.

At every moment, you matter and whatever you are going through matters to God. How to recognize toxic positivity? by Laura Herrera

What is The Difference Between Positivity and Trusting God.

Three different Ways to Deal with Shame…

How to recognize toxic positivity? by Laura Herrera

unrecognizable woman covered with plastic bag

I went through two debilitating chronic diseases for 11 years. During this time there were 17 trips to the ER. I had many failed treatments, went through 10 doctors, had multiple failed surgeries and spent thousands of dollars to get help. I finally found a specialist in New York, states away who rooted out the diseases in two surgeries. As you can imagine I went through an awfully long journey. During this I was often met with hurtful toxic positivity from people. At times, my situation was compared to others because no one could understand what I was going through and thought that comparing stories would help me. I could go on and on with the hurtful phrases I received. Unfortunately, most of them were from well-meaning but misguided Christians. I did not know how to stand up for myself, I felt alone and voiceless. There were many times I went to the bathroom to cry after someone said something hurtful. I would turn inwards and would battle hope. Toxic positivity hurt my relationships with people and with God. I found it hard to open up to others and as a defense mechanism. I in turn carried not only the weight of physical pain, but also emotional pain as well. I now see how that spilled over into my relationship with God as well. I didn’t feel that I could open up to Him for a very long time. I didn’t feel as though what I was going through mattered to Him.

As Christians we are to build each other up and not tear each other down.

Ephesians 4:2 “With all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love,“

This article is to build you up so that you can recognize toxic positivity.

You may have used toxic positivity and may not realize it. You might use it towards yourself and may not realize it either. This article is to help you recognize the pattern from others or from yourself.

Now someone doesn’t have to only go through something medical to be on the receiving end of toxic positivity. In our everyday lives we go through pain, suffering or loss. When met with hurtful phrases of any kind no matter what we are going through- it can cause even further pain or damage in our lives.

What is toxic positivity:

Toxic positivity is shaming in disguise. It covers and stifles the vulnerability one shares with another or with themselves and in turn, can cause one to believe that their needs and what they are going through are not worthy to be heard or helped in any manner. It also dispels hope.

Have you ever experienced a time when you’ve opened up to someone about something personal that you are going through only to be met with hurtful words? Such as- Well, at least you do not have it as bad as…. It could be worse…. It will all be fine… Don’t worry about it…. Always look on the bright side… You’ll get over it… Stay positive…. Everything happens for a reason…

One of my most disliked common expression is, “It could be worse.” Who decides on what makes up ‘as the worst suffering or loss as the worst possible situation? It’s a never-ending ladder to reach the top of who earns the top spot in the worst possible situation. Whatever we are going through we all have needs concerning our situations.

The damaging power it has:

Again, toxic positivity is shaming in disguise. Shame makes us look inward and think what is wrong with me. Shame also screams I am not worthy. It says, no one really cares.

We don’t have to let someone say, “You are not good enough.” – We don’t have to let others say what we are going through is not good enough to be heard or helped. Nor should we be compared to what someone else is going through. This can make us feel voiceless and hopeless.

When we are either met with toxic positivity from others or given towards ourselves, we can end up battling in our minds for the right to be heard by people and by God. Do I have the right to be heard? Is my pain big enough to be empathized with by others and by God? Do I have the right to be helped?

When we stifle our own needs and think towards ourselves, “I should just be positive” we harm ourselves. What if we really needed time to process and heal through something emotionally and decided not to since we didn’t allow ourselves to check-in with ourselves? What if we really needed to see a doctor, but we kept telling ourselves, “I’m ok, it’ll get better.”? Can you see, how damage can be done in both scenarios?

Words have power:

There’s life and death in the power of the tongue.

Proverbs 18:21 NIV “The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.” Again, we have the power to uplift or tear one another down and ourselves.

Ask yourself these questions:

When in my life did I seek help only to find out that what I was going through was devalued by another? How many times have I not spoken up when I was going through something or needed help based on past encounters in life? How has this spilled into my relationship with people in general or with God? Do I ever feel at times what I’m going through shouldn’t be brought up to God because others are going through something worse?

If you’ve answered yes to any of those questions, you have faced toxic positivity. Don’t be discouraged, this is the first step to healing from the wounds and effects of it. This week allow yourself to grieve or ponder on how this has made you feel. Journaling is a great idea to pour out any lingering wounds.

I leave you with this prayer until next week’s article on learning what healthy positivity is and how to stand up for yourself. You’ll also learn how to grow in your love for yourself and in your intimacy with God.

Dear God,

Thank you for being with your precious one. Thank you for opening their eyes that toxic positivity has affected their lives. You God can heal these broken hearts and wounds. May you comfort them today in your unfathomable love as they bring any past hurts and pains. May you shed on them grace, comfort, and joy. Thank you for giving them wisdom, guidance and peace. I ask this in Jesus Name. Amen.

Bio- Laura Herrera

Going through two chronic debilitating diseases for 11 years, being in and out of hospitals and going through multiple doctors and surgeries- Laura now advocates passionately and bridges the gap for those going through the same diseases as she did. Coming from a place of understanding on how chronic diseases can affect all aspects of life; not just including others health, but also their mental wellbeing, finances, family life and relationships in general- she is also passionate about helping those going through any chronic disease. Her articles can be seen on: https://lauraherreratopics.com/

Unhealthy, Toxic or Aggressive People or Healthy, Non-Toxic or Assertive People

When Compassion isn’t Compassion

What is The Difference Between Positivity and Trusting God.

How To Be Thankful And Grateful.

Gratitude to me is thankfulness in action. Being thankful is not only good manners it is a heart response to show appreciation to others. We are celebrating the ‘Thanksgiving Holiday’ this month, but we need to be thankful and grateful all year long. Thankfulness and gratitude comes from the heart of humility. It shows appreciation to others without resentment or wanting something in return.

According to the dictionary what does grateful mean? Grateful is “feeling or showing an appreciation of kindness; thankful” received or experienced with gratitude; welcome”

“By definition: thankfulness is feeling pleased and relieved. Gratefulness is showing appreciation for something done or received. Being thankful is more about expressing a feeling like saying “thank you.” “Where thankfulness is an emotion, gratitude is an attitude of appreciation under any circumstance. Gratitude involves being thankful, but it is more than that. Gratitude means expressing thankfulness and being appreciative of life daily even when nothing exciting happens.”

These definitions show us the difference between the words but in reality they both are necessary to have in life. Feelings will follow thoughts, but gratitude shows through in your attitude.

Ask yourself these three questions to know if you are a thankful and grateful.

First, do I appreciate the little gestures of kindness? Secondly, do I express my gratitude with words and deeds? Thirdly, do I look for ways to express my thankfulness? If you consistently do these things your living with a thankful and grateful heart.

If not, there is hope for you. By looking at your thoughts and actions. We change when we repent and ask God to forgive us for not being thankful. Then ask the Lord to show you how to be thankful for the trivial things in life. Start a thankful list to remind yourself of things that are good and pleasant. Enjoy the trivial things in life by looking at the beauty around you and appreciate it. These small steps will lead you to having a thankful and grateful heart.

Here are a few thankful Scriptures to mediate on: I suggest saying them out loud so that you will hear them.

Psalm 136:1 “O give thanks unto the LORD; for his mercy endures forever.”

Philippians 4:6-7 “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be make know to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

Psalm 95:2 “Let us come into his presence with thanksgiving; let us make a joyful noise to him with songs of praise.”

I Thessalonians 5:16-18 “Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you”

Are You, Your worst enemy?

What does are you your worst enemy mean? It means the way we think affects our life. Our thoughts can trigger emotions and our thoughts left unchecked can become mindsets and strongholds.

When we put ourselves down through unhealthy thinking patterns, we become our worst enemy. These patterns become automatic, before you realize it you are speaking to your self unhealthy things about yourself, life, and others.

Shame, rejection, bitterness, unforgiveness, and fear are just a few issues that affect our thinking. Abuses are the most common culprit for thinking and feeling bad about yourself. Whether it is from present or past abuse it can affect how one feels and thinks about themself.

As you read this article ask yourself 1) Do I speak negatively about myself when things go wrong? 2) Do I blame myself when things don’t workout the way I think they should? 3) Can I separate my being from my doing?

If you answered yes to those questions, then it is time to refuse the negative narrative you speak to yourself. And allow God to bring healing into those areas of your heart. Being aware of our thoughts and how they affect us is possible when you question your thoughts. Ask yourself where this negative thought is coming from? Ask is it true, is it hurtful then turn the thought around to a positive statement of truth according to the Word of God.

For example: If you think ‘I’m not good enough’ then this thought pattern will stop you from trying new things, meeting new people or changing your life. This type of thought pattern is fueled by worthlessness. To conquer this thought pattern, you must speak the truth to yourself. Yes our behaviors can be wrong but who you are as a human being is valuable. God created us with value and worth because He loves us, He sent His only Begotten Son Jesus to die for us. That means to God you are valuable and worth dying for.

2 Corinthians 10:3-5 “For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war according to the flesh, 4) For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, 5) casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ…” This scripture shows us how to take captive thoughts and strongholds that keep us tied up. Unhealthy negative thoughts about yourself are exalting itself against the knowledge of God. Why because God created us in His image.

Here are three areas we become our own worst enemy. 1) Thoughts, become our beliefs when we dwell on them. Thoughts left unchecked will produce emotions. Emotions are just that emotions they are not facts. Same as our opinions they also are not facts. Our perspective can also not be facts. Our opinions and perspective come from our thinking processes. Therefore, thoughts affect our actions.

2) Our behaviors left unrestrained will cause ourselves and others’ problems. My mom would say “Actions speak louder than words.” Which is true but let us add to this statement that ‘actions are thoughts being acted out.’ Usually, we do what we think on if our thoughts are unrestrained. And when we do our actions will affect our outcome. Let us clarify these statements. Unrestrained habitual negative thinking produces unrestrained actions. Actions affect our outcome. The outcome is a product of our thoughts put into actions. The bible says what we sow we reap.

3) In certain situations, our result becomes a product of our actions. We cannot control what others do or every circumstance that happens in life. But keeping in context to this article certain results come from our own unhealthy thinking patterns and actions.

When I was younger my thoughts would make me feel less than others but as I allowed the Spirit of God to teach me according to God’s Word who I am in Christ, He healed the inferiority thoughts. I wrote in my book “The Father’s Daughters” on somethings that I went through. We do not have to be our own worst enemy. There is enough problems in life we don’t have to help beat ourselves up.

We do need to admit when we are at fault or when our behavior is wrong and sinful. When we have repented and ask for forgiveness God does forgive us. 1 John 1:9 “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” We then need to forgive ourselves and walk in His truth.

I do recommend you read the Bible daily. God’s word is truth of who He is and who you are in Him. I also recommend the book “The Father’s Daughters.” God wants to set His people free so that we can love others as we love ourselves. Jesus died so that we could be free in all areas of our lives.

Amazon.com: The Father’s Daughters: Affirmation, Acceptance and Affection (9798705629275): Melton, Dr. Annette: Books

What type of graveclothes are you wearing?

What are grave clothes? When we are born again, we have a regenerated spirit, but we still have the world on us sometimes. God wants you loosed from the trappings of the graveclothes. He wants us to let go of the things that are binding our hands, feet, hearts, and minds.

In John 11:43-44 “Now when He had said these things, He cried with a loud voice, ‘Lazarus, come forth!’ 44And he who had died came out bound hand and foot with graveclothes, and his face was wrapped with a cloth. Jesus said to them, ‘loose him, and let him go.’”

Jesus’ friend Lazarus died and was buried. On the fourth day Jesus came and raised him from the dead. He said Lazarus come forth, Lazarus rose and came out of the tomb, but was still wrapped in graveclothes. Grave clothes are cloth stripes used for burial in ancient days.

These strips of cloth were wrapped around the body to where the entire body was bound. I’ve been thinking of the ways we can become bound even though we are regenerated in spirit we can continue to live bound. It is interesting to me that Jesus told the people who moved the stone to unbind Lazarus. Even then people were needed to help and so are they today. Sometimes we think I don’t need help, or no one understands but God does understand, and he uses others to help unbind us.

To me grave clothes are things that keep you stuck or things that are harming your growth. We are spiritual, emotional, physical beings and we can get stuck in many ways. Mindsets can be binding on your health and growth when we let the painful thoughts of the past or current situations keep us from moving forward, it becomes the grave cloth over the mind. Jesus died so we could have freedom from oppressive thoughts, harmful habits, and harmful relationships.

Eternal life isn’t just going to heaven it is life here and now. But we need to let our hands, feet, or mind be unbound. Can you imagine Lazarus fighting the people who were helping him? Unfortunately, at times we do hinder our help. But today is a good day to allow God to use his word to bring you the help you need and reach out to someone for the help you need.

What is keeping you bound today? What is limiting your growth, stopping you from moving forward, or holding you back? Surrender it to God by giving it to him and ask for his help. Then receive the help you need. My prayer is that if you are hurting today, you receive the help you need to move in the right direction.

The Marvelous Mind & Know your thoughts !

Have this mind…

What is The Shame-Train?

Shame has a way of following you like a continuous train. With repetitious thoughts that haunt you wherever you go. Shame is like a train in that it continuous with many different cars (thoughts) moving along the tracks of life. Wherever the locomotive goes the cars follow.

The cars of the shame train are called I should have, I can’t, not good enough, not pretty enough, not popular enough, not loved, no one cares about me, I’m to old, to skinny, to fat, not smart enough… Then there is a rejection car, fear car, anxiety car, unforgiveness, I will always be this way car…

Shame is a pervasive feeling and thoughts of I am bad, flawed, or damaged. It goes with you; it’s deep within your heart and mind. A few causes of shame are abuse in all forms, neglect, or conditional love. In each one of those there is a myriad of other issues.

How do we break free and jump off the shame-train? Through the power of God, His Word and by Christ love we are healed, set free and can jump off that train.

Isaiah 53:3 MSG “He was looked down on and passed over, a man who suffered, who knew pain firsthand. One look at him and people turned away, We looked down on him, thought he was scum. But the fact is, it was our pains he carried-our disfigurements, all the things wrong with us.” Jesus took our shame to the cross so that He could stand in our place, and we could be healed and set free.

As we are healed by God in the name of Jesus all sorrow of the shame is replaced with His acceptance and love. As a child of God, you don’t have to carry the pain of the past of what someone did or said to you, what you did or said either when we surrender to God the hurts, pain and sorrows He fills it with his healing. To be free of shame and jump off the shame-train name the car and surrender the pain to God. Process shame with releasing it and surrendering it over to God.

Forgiveness flows as you give it to God, sometimes we hold onto it through unforgiveness because we want retribution for what was done to us but God says vengeance is his so we trust he will deal with it we can let go.

Forgiveness frees you to heal and grow.

In the book “The Father’s Daughters” I talk about shame, rejection, and forgiveness. If you have never read it, I do recommend getting it on Amazon it has powerful prayers to pray for your healing and deliverance. It truly is time to jump off the shame-train, you can’t wait till it stops, because it never stops it just keeps adding more cars (thoughts). In Christ love there is peace, His peace. There is joy too.

Amazon.com: The Father’s Daughters: Affirmation, Acceptance and Affection (9798705629275): Melton, Dr. Annette: Books

How do you get Clarity Of Vision?

What is clarity of vision? How does one know they are seeing clearly? I had cataract surgery on my right eye one week ago but then the coming week the left eye. As I think about the difference in my right eye to my left, I realize cataracts slowly diminished my vision. It is so gradual that you do not realize it till its significant.

I don’t know why we get cataracts, but I do realize my clarity of sight was diminished. Which makes me think about life! How we will go along living with loss of vision and do not even realize it until something major happens?

I had the opportunity on Sunday evening to preach, I spoke about “It’s a matter of heart.” You can go to Facebooks ‘Central Church of God’ page in Portage Indiana to hear the message dated 10-3-21 While I sit here and type this, I also know that our hearts effect our vison. We can be so sure that something is one way and find out it is not because our heart was not in the right place. So today is the day to do a heart check.

The Bible tells us in Jeremiah 17:9-10 “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked, who can know it? 10) I the LORD search the heart. I test the mind, even to give every man according to the fruit of his doings.” Therefore, we cannot fully know what is in our hearts unless God reveals it.

Our hearts can deceive us to believe our motives are ok, our reasoning is right, and our opinions matter.

Your heart is the center of being, it consists of feeling, thoughts, beliefs, and personality. The Revell Bible Dictionary states, “Here is what a person is really like, in contrast to an external demeanor intended to impress others.” Which means it is where we see and hear through. How we see and hear is a matter of heart.

God wants to restore and revive hearts today. So that you can see and hear with clarity. He wants to heal wounded hearts. He wants to heal what you cannot see but what is affecting how you see.

The word restore in The Bible Dictionary means, “to renew, heal; make alive.” Some are going through the motions but have lost their first love, due to hurts that are unresolved. I believe God wants to show you what is in your heart to bring healing into your life. I heard the Holy Spirit say, “outside wounds are visible, inside wounds are not, they will manifest in many unhealthy ways, but the original wound needs My healing, My peace and restoration.” Today is the day to call on the Lord and receive healing and restoration in your heart. So that you can have clarity of vision.

Hebrews 4:12-13 “For the Word of God is living and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the division of soul and spirit, and of joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart. 13) And there is no creature hidden from His sight, but all things are naked and open to the eyes of Him to Whom we must give accounts.”

God’s word searches our hearts and separates the thoughts and intents/ motives. We must be willing to let the word of God and the Holy Spirit search our hearts. Through humility we learn our motives, through repentance we receive the change that is need. Today is your day for clarity of vision. Allow God to search your heart and heal what is needed and restore what was lost.

Blessings,

Dr. Annette

Do you need clarity? Blurred Vision…