Disappointment do’s and don’ts

What are they and how do we walk through them?  It’s safe to say everyone experiences disappointments sometime in their lives.  Some disappointments are slight and therefore easier to let it go.   

The word disappointment means: “a feeling of dissatisfaction that follows the failure of expectations or hopes to manifest.” Another meaning for disappointment is, “the feeling of sadness or displeasure caused by the defeat of ones hopes and expectations.”  These are the same just worded a little differently.

Bigger disappointments can cause us to draw back in and that is when you’ve not dealt with your own expectations and feelings.

When we don’t deal with the disappointments they will worsen into discouragement and then despondency.  Disappointments deal with our expectations and hopes.  Therefore, we can change our thinking about them.  The choice is ours. Some things are easier to let go of than others.  It’s the other things that need to be worked through. 

For example, I have plans to go to lunch with a friend and they must cancel.  That’s a little disappointment but I move on and do something different because we all get unplanned interrupting events we must deal with.

But when the expectation of the event is high and it doesn’t happen then disappointment in forms of sadness, frustration and even hurt can and should be dealt with.

So how do you deal with and walk through disappointments? 

First, recognize your disappointed, write it down or talk it out.  Repressing it or stuffing it only makes it worsen.

Secondly, step back and detach from the feelings of the disappointment and take a good look at every side of it.  Ask your self a few questions such as ‘were my expectations to high’ or ‘was this out of my control’?  What ever question that helps you to get the right perspective is the question for you.

Thirdly, pray about it. God knows how your feeling and thinking.  Therefore, be honest about it in your prayers.

Fourthly, allow God to heal your heart concerning the hurting disappointments.

The Rejection Connection

The Rejection Connection 

 

We all face rejection. I don’t think it’s a matter of if but when. There are different forms of rejection but it’s still rejection. It can sting in your heart and play with your mind if you let it.

Some people can shake rejection off easier than others but in the end most of us if not all of us have faced rejection in our lives.

Rejection is part of conflicts and most people try to avoid conflicts. I don’t think anyone likes rejection either.

But what do you do when you’re faced with it? The truth is you have choices and these choices will determine your attitude and outcome through rejection.

The first way some people handle rejection is, to wallow in it and retaliate. If you allow yourself to wallow and retaliate it will cause you more rejection. It puts you in a harder place to heal because unforgiveness will grow deeper. This is not a healthy way to deal with rejection.

The second way some people handle rejection is, to run away and build walls. Running away from the hurt and building a wall so you won’t feel rejection only makes you hard hearted and bitter. Bitterness will grow and effect all your relationships. This also is not a healthy way to deal with rejection.

The third way some people handle rejection is, to identify it, let it out, forgive and move on.

To identify it means recognize the anxiety, hurt or frustration over the rejection. Let it out means talk to someone or journal the hurt and release the emotion of it, cry if need be. Then choose to forgive who or what ever the cause of rejection is. Moving on after the rejection is dealt with will feel like freedom to you. This is the healthy way to deal with rejection.

But, if your struggling with rejection stop for a moment and think about this scripture.

Isaiah 53:2-5 “For He shall grow up before Him as a tender plant, and as a root out of dry ground.” Maybe it feels like a dry place. “He has no form or comeliness; And when we see Him, there is no beauty that we should desire Him.” Means not handsome, nothing in his appearance would attract you to him. 3- “He is despised and rejected by men, A Man of sorrows and acquainted with grief.” He understands rejection to its deepest hurt. “And we hid, as it were, our faces from Him; He was despised, and we did not esteem Him”  Everyone forsake him.   4-“Surely He as borne our grief’s and carried our sorrows; Yet we esteemed Him stricken, Smitten by God, and afflicted.”  He was stricken and smitten for us.  5-“But He was wounded for our transgression, He was bruised for our iniquities; The chastisement for our peace was upon Him, and by his stripes we are healed.” 

Wow!  Jesus went through severe rejection by not only the Jewish leaders but by all even his closest friends and family. So, if your struggling over rejection call on the Lord to help you through the rejection and give him the hurt and He will heal you.  Choose forgiveness and peace and healing today.

The rejection connection is we all face it.  The choice is yours choosing the right way to handle it produces freedom.