Tag: expectations

What exactly is your hope in?

Recently I had read Proverbs 13:12 “Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but when the desire comes, it is a tree of life.” This made me think about hope and how it affects us. How do you respond when something you desire does not happen? What type of mood does it produce in you? These are a few questions we will look at.

“Hope 1) a feeling of expectation and desire for a certain thing to happen. (expectation desires)” “2) means want something o happen or be the case. (expect, anticipate)”

It is obvious that hope deals with expectations and desires. But what is the root the foundation of our hope is it in something or someone? If you place your hope in people or things you are setting yourself up for disappointments but if you are placing your hope in God, you will have a solid rock to rely on.

We all have expectations and desires for certain outcomes in life. And that is a good thing but if the desire or expectation has not been met how do you handle the disappointment? Here are few different ways people handle disappointment.

Some people handle the disappointment with bitterness. They stew and brew over the situation and blame someone else. This is not productive. The bitterness eats away at the soul it is not healthy nor does it generate life.

Some individuals handle disappointment with self-pity. Self-pity makes the person feel bad about themselves. This also is an unhealthy way to deal with disappointment. Self-pity wants you to indulge in it and it will open the door to situational depression. This also does not produce life.

With both these outcomes it shows us that the hope was in something or someone instead of in God. The bible gives us many verses to place our hope in God. Placing your hope your desires and expectation in God and on his word is the solid foundation.

1 Peter 1:13 “Therefore gird up the loins of your mind, be sober, and rest your hope fully upon the grace that is to be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ.” 1 Corinthians 13:13 “And now abide faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is love.” Hebrews 11:1 “Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.”

A Biblical hope is’ confident expectation in God.’ What if it still does not happen the way you want? Then go to God for the answer. I have experienced times where I thought something would go a certain way I was expecting, and it did not. This is when we must reevaluate. Is this God’s will, plan and time?  Was I asking and expecting my will in the situation?

The perfect plan is God’s not ours. His desire is for you when you are his child but understanding where your hope rests is important to overcoming in disappointment. Place your trust and hope in God. Be filled with his word put your expectations in God and you will be at peace.

Disappointment do’s and don’ts

Disappointment do’s and don’ts

What are they and how do we walk through them?  It’s safe to say everyone experiences disappointments sometime in their lives.  Some disappointments are slight and therefore easier to let it go.   

The word disappointment means: “a feeling of dissatisfaction that follows the failure of expectations or hopes to manifest.” Another meaning for disappointment is, “the feeling of sadness or displeasure caused by the defeat of ones hopes and expectations.”  These are the same just worded a little differently.

Bigger disappointments can cause us to draw back in and that is when you’ve not dealt with your own expectations and feelings.

When we don’t deal with the disappointments they will worsen into discouragement and then despondency.  Disappointments deal with our expectations and hopes.  Therefore, we can change our thinking about them.  The choice is ours. Some things are easier to let go of than others.  It’s the other things that need to be worked through. 

For example, I have plans to go to lunch with a friend and they must cancel.  That’s a little disappointment but I move on and do something different because we all get unplanned interrupting events we must deal with.

But when the expectation of the event is high and it doesn’t happen then disappointment in forms of sadness, frustration and even hurt can and should be dealt with.

So how do you deal with and walk through disappointments? 

First, recognize your disappointed, write it down or talk it out.  Repressing it or stuffing it only makes it worsen.

Secondly, step back and detach from the feelings of the disappointment and take a good look at every side of it.  Ask your self a few questions such as ‘were my expectations to high’ or ‘was this out of my control’?  What ever question that helps you to get the right perspective is the question for you.

Thirdly, pray about it. God knows how your feeling and thinking.  Therefore, be honest about it in your prayers.

Fourthly, allow God to heal your heart concerning the hurting disappointments.