Strengthen your relationships…

There are some things that strengthen relationships.  Misunderstanding is if it is a good relationship you don’t need to do anything to help it.  Status quo doesn’t apply in relationships.  That mistaken belief has ruined many relationships.  Be it marital, friend or family relationship input should go in to get a healthy return.

The Bible says, ‘what you sow you reap.’  If your wish is to grow healthy relationships, then sow time and energy on them.

How do you strengthen your relationships?

First by contact with meaningful occasions of common experiences of friendship and communication.

Meaningful shared occasions could be anything from dinner to adventures.  Going to the movies, lunch, shopping, playing games, sporting events etc.  These are bonding moments which are relationship builders.  Time spent with someone is equal to caring.

Communication is an essential part of all relationships. There are five levels of communication according to Dr. Gary Smalley.

First is, “clichés which are phrases or opinions that is overused and betrays a lack of original thought.”  Wikipedia states, “A cliché is an expression, idea or element of an artistic work  which has become over used to the point of losing its original meaning or effect, even to the point of being trite or irritation, especially when at some earlier time it was considered meaningful or novel.” 

So, it’s superficial conversation because it lacks originality.  Sort of like a safe conversation that only speaks about surface stuff personal information is not given.  One can understand why this is first level of communication.

The second level of communication is ‘Facts.’  Facts are “a thing that is known or proved to be true.” Facts also are “A piece of information used as evidence or as part of a report or news article.  Facts are used in discussing the significance of something that is the case.”  This level of communication is still safe because it is proven information facts.  Their opinions aren’t involved.

The third level of communications is ‘Opinions.’ “Opinions are a view or judgment formed about something, not necessarily based on fact or knowledge.”  Also, “opinion is an estimation of the quality or worth of someone or something.”  This is the place where we are giving our opinions.  This level of communication is also where conflicts arise.  If you experience conflict during opinion giving, we must realize our opinions are just opinions not always facts. 

If a person has any roots of shame their opinion is connected to their identity and this causes problems in conflict.  Why, because they’re going to think you don’t love them if you don’t accept their opinion.

The fourth level of communication is ‘feelings.’  “Feelings are an emotional state or reaction.”  Emotions are an essential component of the communication on the intimate level.  That it is safe to say I feel is a deeper level of communication.  It’s healthy to voice how you’re feeling and knowing the individual who your telling your own feelings too also is listening.  Even though they may or may not understand your feelings but that their listening is an intimate conversation.  This leads to sharing what you need.

The fifth level of communication is ‘needs.’  “Needs are a necessity. A need is something that is necessary for an organism to live a healthy life.”  Knowing how you feel and what you need is essential to a healthy relationship.  It could be as simple as needing a hug.

Begin today enhancing your relationships.