I love to watch anything about treasure hunting. The mystery of where is it and how did it get
lost fascinates me.
What do you treasure most?
Have you ever thought about the treasures of your heart/soul? Maybe your wondering what are those
treasures? Some are attitudes, desires,
thoughts, values… this list comes from
the book ‘Boundaries in Marriage’ by Dr. H. Cloud and Dr. J. Townsend. We are responsible for our own treasures.
What do you consider to be a treasure? We only have control over our selves such as
our abilities to be happy, smile, think, investigate, choices, decisions etc. they
are ours.
In the above-mentioned book, it discusses relationships and
boundaries. Healthy relationships don’t
complete each other they complement each other.
There is a chapter in the book called “It takes two to make One.” They state, “Complementing each other means
bringing different perspectives, talents, abilities, experiences and other gifts
to the relationship and forming a partnership.”
I love that statement because it forces couples to look beyond
the statements of, they fulfill me and makes them think about what they bring
to the relationship.
They also state in the book, “Completing each other means making
up for one’s immaturity as a person.” Marriage
is meant to be a 100-100% going into marriage based on the other person making
up your immaturity doesn’t produce a healthy relationship. We each are responsible for our own character.
Here are just a few abilities we each must have that are basic
human requirements. “They are the ability to: learn and grow, have initiative
and drive, say no, be vulnerable and share feelings, grieve, be sexual, be
spiritual, be free and not controlled by external or internal factors.” I recommend reading the book, ‘Boundaries in
Marriage.’
If your completeness is dependent on another you will constantly
be looking for something, they can’t give you.
Only you can do the work needed to build your esteem and character.
Boundaries are where you start and stop. Knowing your own boundaries helps you to
choose your responses. These areas of
our life if we don’t evaluate and decide our responses then you’re going to
feel overwhelmed.
Making a hard conversation that could back-fire isn’t easy but
not addressing an issue is even harder to live with.
I like to have couples that I have worked with look at this list
and write what it means to them. Because
we are responsible for our own treasures.
“Your feelings, attitudes, behaviors, choices, limits, desires,
thoughts, values, talents, and love are aspects of your soul.” Owning your own treasures brings value to
your relationships.
The bible describes wisdom as a valuable treasure. Wisdom gives us the ability to process the
knowledge we have with the right choice.
God’s word also tells us that if we ask, God will give us wisdom
generously. To me wisdom is a great and
valuable treasure.
Proverbs 8:10 “For wisdom is better than rubies and all the
things one may desire cannot be compared with her.”
Knowing what to do when you need to do it is wisdom. Start looking at the treasures of your soul
and you will begin to understand about yourself and this helps us give from
what we have.
I know my identity is in Christ.
He has built me to be healthier and more confident in him and in my
life. To me Jesus is the Wisdom of God. He will help you look at the treasures of
your soul and help you grow in complementing your spouse.
