Decisions and decisions…

When is it right to do right?  “It is always right to do right.”  That’s something that Pastor Charles Baker would always say.  Initially, I would consider what but as my whole life has gone on, they are words I have lived by.  When I’m unsure of my response or do not know which direction taking these words help to guide my decisions.

Life has numerous ups and downs and along with them come so many decisions.  Be it a choice of moral, ethical or just plain what you think and like.  Knowing distinction of right and wrong helps to lead us on the path of life.

I follow the biblical path of right and wrong.  But when facing non-scriptural stuff in knowing what’s the right thing to do it always is the correct choice.

When we are faced with decisions, if you look at every side and make a quality decision based in ethical and moral quality will always be the right decision.

Since I’m a child of God, I know that if I ask, he will lead me if I’m listening.  God leads through peace.  Confusion does not come from God.  So, if you are confused in the decision go back and look at it from all sides and wait until you have clarity to decide.

It isn’t always so easy to do what you know is right if you like what is wrong.  But you can do right if you want to make a wrong through processing what is right and what outcomes will be.

Maybe today your facing decisions that can alter your life.  Remember ‘it’s always right to do right.’  Follow the peace of God in your decisions and you’ll make quality decisions.

God’s Love is R.E.A.L

God’s love is Reliable.  Reason why it’s reliable because you can rely on his love.  Reliable means that it is trustworthy.  Scripture states, “God so loved the World he sent his one and only son to die for it.” 

God’s love is so reliable he sent His son Jesus to die for you before you ever where born.  We do know that history has shown God’s love for all mankind.  History, archeology and prophecy have demonstrated what is in the Bible.  There are the facts throughout history that prove the truth of the Word of God.

God’s love is eternal.  Why because God is love and that he existed before mankind was created and That He provided the way to eternal life.  God is everlasting there is no beginning and no end of Almighty God.  Therefore, his love is eternal.

God’s love is for all.  All this means everyone.  Unfortunately, some won’t accept his love by Christ Jesus.  But nonetheless, it is available for all who call on the name of the Lord.  The Entire 7.7 Billion people and counting.  Past, present and future could experience God’ love.  Choice was ours to accept or deny his love. 

God’s love is love.  The true definition of love is God.  Scripture tells us in I John 4 “God is love.” In 1 Corinthians 13 it tells us what love looks like.  All the way through scripture it gives the expression of God’s love as unfailing, everlasting, strong love.

God’s love is personal.  You can experience the love of God through His Son.  If you’ve come to this blog and you’ve never asked Christ in your life today’s your day.  Ask him to demonstrate to you his love and to come into your life and forgive you of your sins.

The Bible says we all sinned and fell short of the Glory of God.  Ask today and you receive Jesus as your Savior and Lord.  You encounter the love of God personally.  For all those of us that have felt the Lord personally it is a good reminder that his love is reliable, eternal, for all, and real love.    

People… and Personality

After writing blog article People… I was asked on Facebook what is the personality?  I’ve been thinking about this question.

Personality means for me the traits/tendencies, like and dislikes, and the character strengths and weakness all combining into your personality.  I like using a simple questionnaire Florence Littauer has in the back of her book ‘Your Personality Tree.’

Before I became a SYMBIS Facilitator, while doing premarital counseling I would have a couple take the personality test.  In doing that test the couple then begins to understand the whys and why nots of their partner’s choices, likes and dislikes and type of their personality.  This is initiating good conversations in premarital counseling.

The SYMBIS questionnaire gets deeper into things such as your decision making, finances, strengths and weakness, expectations and more.  It’s well worth thirty-five dollars per couple if you want an excellent assessment of yourself and your mate.  Even singles may take the assessment to help determine their strengths and weakness and their relationship readiness.

Dr. Gary Smalley in his book ‘Making Love Last Forever’ has a chapter on personality traits and put it into four personality types.  I would recommend this book for couples to be done together to reinforce or help heal their marital relationship. 

Dr. Gary Smalley stated on page 159 in the book “We’re all a blend of four basic personality types, but most of us have one or two dominant styles.”  I like his remark because it makes clear that there’s a blend and we typically are one or two dominant styles. 

Understanding these personality styles will help people relate to other persons no one person is the same and that’s a good thing, but everybody has some characteristics that do fall under four different personality types.  These types are called Sanguine, Choleric, Melancholy as well as Phlegmatic. 

I like this category because it’s a practical way to find out and discover about yourself and others.  I believe the better we understand people that it produces compassion.

I would like to hear from the reader to learn if you’ve ever took a personality test and what three things you learned.  Please think about leaving a comment on this blog.

Also, to consider sharing the blog on your Facebook page, Instagram or Twitter.  Let’s get the Whole World thinking about people and understanding each other better.

Personality has strengths and weakness when we understand our strength and weakness, we can adapt, empower and overcome in the areas that we need to.

People…

There are 7.7 billion people in the world as of Oct 2019.  How many different types of people are there in the 7.7 billion? I don’t know but no matter your nationalities and culture people are still people.  People are humans we all have different characteristics and mannerisms but, in the end, we’re still humans.

While working in my masters I had several classes on personalities.  In March 2019, I became a SYMBIS Facilitator.  This program has been developed by Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott. To start the individual must answer 300 questions to determine their different personality aspects.  Knowing your kind of personality and your mates or your friends contributes to better understanding of mutual strengths or weaknesses.

Why is that so important?  It’s important because the more we recognize personalities the more our understanding and compassion will be toward others.  Such as, type A or Chloric personalities are forward-thinking, they see the outcome, they take charge, but they have weaknesses too they might sound frank, bossy or sometimes brash.

There are various tests to determine your personality.  These tests must be answered in all honesty in order to identify the true personality.  Sometimes we imagine ourselves in a different way than we operate.  A healthy viewpoint is to answer as best as possible.

Through our life we are changing and growing.  Our personality does as well.  Most of us are a combination of two types.  Knowing people’s personalities helps not just in relationships, but on the job, school, church, and sports etc.

Individuals from all walks of life no matter where you live all around the world have personalities.  Culture can contribute to the way you live but your real personality is part of your inner being.

A wounded person will not be fully plugged in to understanding their real personality.  Survival mode makes the person put on a mask so that they can get through a violent or unhealthy situation whether in childhood or as an adult.

Parents that aren’t understanding or accept the child’s personality might squash the child’s soul and hence they put on the personality traits acceptable to the unhealthy parent. 

As they grow, they may develop unhealthy defense mechanism due to living with another person’s interpretation of their life.  Once these individuals are healed from the unacceptance they start to flourish an uncover their identity and personality.

Some of what children need growing up is positive affirmations, acceptance and affection.  Such as if the child is very talkative give them a healthy outlet to express their words.  Times have changed there is so much information out there to help empower your children and allow them positive ways to express their personality as it develops.

Why is it important because I believe to have empathy and compassion, we need to understand others where they are, so that we don’t try to make them like our personality.

I’m more of a do it now take-charge personality my husband is more stop, look at it and think about it then do it.  We blend by these opposites because we accept our differences in our personalities and appreciate how it balances us.

Begin looking at people with eyes of understanding their personality and not judgement of it this produces compassion.

Three Areas of Rejection:

The three areas of rejection are people, self and God.  In those three categories are countless ways and why we experience rejection.  These three areas of refusal entail all kinds of subtitles like jobs, auditions, family etc.

Life encompasses so many different areas of a person’s lifetime from birth to death.  “Life is the dash mark in the gravestone.”  But in life we all face challenges.  How we approach a challenge determines our outcome internally and realistically.

‘The Rejection Connection’ article I wrote on this blog has shown us everyone faces rejection at some point in their life.  It also discussed how to handle rejection in a healthy way.

But now I want to break down these three areas of rejection. Because we are either accepted or not which is rejection.  There are different levels of rejection from applying for a job to the hurt of a breakup.  How you handle rejection can determine your outlook towards others, yourself and even God.

Rejection doesn’t feel good for anyone because with rejection comes disappointment and hurt.  If you turn the rejection inward it can become despondency and situational depression.  If you haven’t read the “Rejection Connection” it will help you to process unresolved rejection.

People rejection consists of anything you wanted or tried, and then you didn’t get the opportunity you wanted or a person you thought you loved etc.  People rejection is all around us from simple situations to complex relationships.  But the truth is sometimes not getting what we thought we wanted turns out better for us.

Self-rejection has a profound effect on our physical and psychological wellbeing.  When we do not accept ourselves, it clouds our vision of others.  Real or perceived rejection stings but self-rejection will affect our outlook on life, love and relationships.  Take necessary steps to learn and just like yourself so that you no longer reject yourself for whatever real or perceived reasons.  Forgive yourself for your mistakes.  If you need some help to overcome seek wise counsel that will help to walk you through whatever holds you back from liking yourself.

God rejection isn’t a truth.  God created man he doesn’t reject us he may not like your behavior and there are consequences to our wrong behaviors, but he loves you.  He sent his son to die so you could have eternal life with him, so God rejection is just perceived rejection.  Unfortunately, the perceived rejection can hurt and feel just as much as real rejection.

I recommend doing what I wrote in the “rejection connection.”   “The third way some people handle rejection is, to identify it, let it out, forgive and move on.” 

“To identify it means recognize the anxiety, hurt or frustration over the rejection.  Let it out means talk to someone or journal the hurt and release the emotion of it, cry if need be.”  “Then choose to forgive who or whatever the cause of rejection was.”

No matter the kind of rejection that you are facing you will be able to walk in freedom from it.

Who are you?

Have you heard the statement “Just be you?”  If you’ve never looked at who you are or understand what you like and dislike that is a tough statement.

Be you constitutes your being honest with who you are or how you think and feel.  No masks, no hidden agendas be your real self.  Being you may also mean to be honest with yourself and others.  Not through rudeness or disrespectful but honest and sincere.

For some that is very difficult.  When I was a young woman it was difficult because of low self-esteem.  I didn’t like my natural body and truthfully wanted a different one.  But we cannot exchange our bodies completely.  However, we can change how we look at ourselves.

I saw a very short girl who couldn’t walk or breathe.  I also couldn’t run, jump or walk any distance.  As I grew older, I learned my appearance doesn’t define me, my health does not define me either.  I adopted that mindset, “fix what you can and accept what you can’t.”

Living with a disability has taught me many things but most importantly the disability doesn’t define me either.

The Bible tells us in Psalm 139:13-14 “For You formed me inward parts; You covered my in my mother’s womb. 14) I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made…”  We can rest in knowing God shaped and knew us in our mother’s womb.  On why one being born with disabilities I don’t know neither will I ever know.  But I understand God knows me.  Being you are learning experiences because when we grow up and develop our likes, tastes and opinions change.

Learn, investigate research try new things to see what you like and then you’ll know what you don’t like.

It’s 2020 Be you!    

Have this mind…

As I was just reading the other morning in Philippians chapter three this declaration stood out to me.  “Have this mind.” 

Chapter three begins “Rejoice in the Lord.”  This alone is a good mentality to have but goes on to say in verse 7 “but what things were gain to me, these I counted loss for Christ.”  “Being found in Him not having my own righteousness but that righteousness which is from faith in Christ.”

All the things we look at as achievements are really nothing “compared to the excellence of the knowledge of Christ Jesus.”  What does that mean?  It does not mean you abandon all your goals; it also doesn’t mean that you do not achieve in life.  It does mean you know everything you do and achieve aren’t better than the relationship between you and Christ.  He’s the truth, Life and Way.  Without him there’s nothing we can do or have that matters in eternity.

When we die, we don’t take our possessions, accomplishments or titles we come before God either in Christ or without.

That is why the Apostle Paul states in, Philippians 3:12-15 “Not that I have already attained, or am already perfected; but I press on, that I may lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus has also laid hold of me. 13) Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forward to those things which are ahead. 14) I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. 15) Therefore let us, as many as are mature, have this mind…”

I wrote in my journal yesterday “Forgetting those things which are behind us and reach forward to those things which are ahead.  I press (on) toward the goal “have this mind.”  Reach and do not look back on glorious days.  Press on because the more that you recount the past the harder it will be to move forward.  Their over and gone look ahead, press in and go forward be not puffed up be pressed in.”

Pressed in is forward-thinking.  This mind is a calm mind, it is a focused mind and moving forward mindset.  Vision is crucial to moving forward. Press on

What are your boundaries…

What is a boundary?  A boundary is, “the line that marks the limits of an area; a dividing line.”  Like property etc. 

But why do people need boundaries?  People need boundaries so that they do not go beyond their limit.  Stresses can come in all kinds of ways but when you know your limit, you’ll able to moderate your needs for down time and rest.

It’s important to know what you’re willing to do and not do.  Why is it so that your actively present instead of being pressured to do anything that you don’t believe in or you want to do.  Finding your voice and your no is essential to living a healthy life.

Finding your voice to me means being able to say how you feel and think about something.  It’s to be able to express your thoughts and feelings in a healthy way.  That’s being true to yourself and expressing it.

Your yes or no must be inline with your heart.  Find your no means, saying No when you don’t want to do something.  For some saying no is difficult this will cause them stress because that’s when they are doing what they really don’t want to do.  It is okay saying no I can’t, or I don’t want to.

If saying no is difficult for you then speak truth to yourself regarding the situation and say to yourself it’s okay to say no.  Self-talking about truths helps us to overcome. 

Begin today being true to your own hearts and minds by using your yes and no.

Strengths and Weaknesses…

Accepting your strengths and strengthening your weakness.  Our strengths are the things we are good at or excel in and we usually enjoy.  Strengths can also be things that come naturally to you.  If you take for granted your strengths, you won’t grow in them.  It’s always beneficial to sharpen your skills and strengths.  Supporting your own strengths and improving them makes you more productive and satisfied. 

Weaknesses can be strengthened with knowledge and focused discipline but first one must recognize it’s a weakness.  Request for help can take you to the next phase-out of your weakness.  Such as, habitual tardiness that is the symptom of poor time management.  Learn what the sum of time you will need and don’t add to it.  Resist adding to the list before going somewhere.

I love preaching, teaching and counseling.  Doing this blog is a form of strengthening a weakness because grammar and spelling are not my strengths.  But when I took the plunge and researched about blogs, I decided to conquer my hesitation/fear that I wouldn’t be able to do this.  Here we are four months later I’m grateful for this opportunity.

I think practical action helps one to achieve.  To try new things helps our brains to stay healthy.  This also helps our self-esteem and achievements build our esteem.  It is a good feeling to try something and to finish it.  Perfectionism stands in the way of trying new things.  Remember everybody fails at something but success is back-up and trying again.

I’m still learning about and trying new things.  I have still not figured out how to make the category with this blog, but I chose to keep trying and if it is necessary, spending the money to get the help I need.

It’s wisdom when we’re stuck to seek help.  Wither it is at writing or your personal mental health living in the same patterns only stops the increase psychologically, emotionally, physically.  Even spiritually growing is good.

Try something new, read a book, change your workout routine, call that person that you were thinking about, rise and fortify your weaknesses and embrace your strengths.

Tested, Tried and Proven…

During my devotions on Jan 4th I asked the Lord what was on his heart and I heard in my spirit “love, love and more love.” “Faith tested, tried and proven trust.”

Faith is…?  To you what is faith?  What does it mean to have faith?  How is your faith tested, tried and proven?  These are the questions we need to know so when we are faced with situations, we can let faith arise within our hearts and lean on God without always understanding what is happening.

Through the trials the bible states our faith is being tested, tried and producing patience/endurance.  Looking at the word trials or tribulations other words related to them are development, lifestyle, growth, suffering, circumstances, journey.

James 1:2-4 “My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, 3) knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. 4) But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing.”

Tested faith produces patience, letting patience have its full work produces tried and proven.  A perfect and complete individual who is matured in faith.

What is faith?  Scripture states in, Hebrews 11:1 “Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.”  Faith for me is the trust, belief and confidence in the Creator God Most High who sent His Own Son Jesus dying for me. Faith comes from Him, is by Him and through Him.

Hebrews 11:6 states, “But without faith, it is impossible to please Him, for He who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.”  This describes faith, it believes God exists it also believes that he is a rewarder of those who seek him.

I love how Almighty God is powerful and practical.  We complicate God with our own assumptions and traditions.  God loves us so much he sent His Son to take away our sin by dying on the cross.  Faith comes through Him we all get a seed of faith as you trust God in situations it grows and becomes tested, tried and proven, sounds simple because it is. 

We complicate it with doubt, fears, worries.  Simple believing faith like a child is all we need.  If your struggling with the faith to trust God stop for a moment and look around you and you will see something good to be thankful for.  Start reading the Scriptures on who he is and His goodness it will build up your faith.