Beauty For Ashes

Lessons for inner healing and developing healthy mindsets.

This page’s purpose is to focus on inner healing and developing healthy mindsets. Its purpose is also to empower individuals to overcome unhealthy thoughts, strongholds or habits with the teachings and resources

I led a woman’s support group for 10 years from 2005-2015 called Beauty for Ashes. Recently in prayer I felt led to teach beauty for ashes again.

Beauty for Ashes is a vision God birthed in my heart to bring clarity and healing transformed in his daughters.  He showed me little girls need affirmations, acceptance and affection from their father’s growing up. When those three areas are lacking, girls will fill the unmet need in unhealthy ways as they grow up. Only God can heal the unmet needs we have.

Through Beauty for Ashes, I taught on various topics including those three areas along with rejection, bitterness, codependency and so much more. People were healed by God through this ministry. I have a vision of training others to lead support groups of Beauty for Ashes nationally and worldwide.

The purpose of this page is to share the support groups teachings and provide a place where you can ask questions and contact Dr. Annette through email. Contact Me

Testimonies:

Krissie S.

About ten years ago in my early thirties, I joined Dr. Annette Melton’s group Beauty For Ashes, bible study, through a church both of us were attending at that time. Before I joined her group, I was going through some hard times. Some of the things I was dealing with was mental abuse from my childhood and hurt from another church. I was depressed and had trouble trusting people because of everything I had been through. One of the books we were working on was a book on codependency. That book showed me how to better deal with all my past relationships by seeing through a new perspective. Not only was the book very helpful, but Annette helped me a lot through prayer and advice. Finally, I like the fact of meeting in a small group with other women of all ages. We all became close and helped each other by sharing our experiences and supporting each other. Beauty for Ashes, is definitely a group that I would recommend, for women, who are going through anything.

Judy B.

When my friend, Annette, asked me to share a testimony about what the Beauty for Ashes support group had meant to me, my first thought was “that was so long ago I don’t know if I can remember how I was helped by being a part of the group.” As I thought further about this, I know that I enjoyed and appreciated being a part of a group of women in a home setting where we studied and shared the ideas of a Christian book with the Bible as a source of the truths we were learning. I also knew that the teacher, Annette, was a person who took time with the Lord, studied the word, and heard from the Lord which allowed the support group to be more impactful.

My next thought was that I needed to go back and look at the two books that we studied, Beauty for Ashes, by Joyce Meyer and Codependency by Pat Springle. As I was leafing through the Codependency book, I came to the part about a bond servant and what that meant. A bond servant is one who has been a slave with no control of his life for six years, and in the seventh year is given the choice to stay with his master and continue to serve or to go free having control over his own life. If the master had been kind and good, he may choose to stay but if not, he may leave. So, the bond servant is a picture of us having given control of our lives over to a loving caring father God. But as a Christian, we can still choose to be in control in our own lives and oftentimes controlling others through words, actions and fears.

A codependent person can produce actions of control. Because I was a person who liked to be in control of my circumstances, so that I could make sure that everything turned out okay, the support group study spoke into my life.

Then my next thought was, I need to read this book again, because sometimes we let go of things we have learned and need to be refreshed in them. We also do not always grasp everything the first time we read it or don’t see how it connects to us. As of today April 29th, of 2020, the codependency book that was introduced in the Beauty for Ashes support group continues to be a spiritual value in my life. As I reread what it meant to be a bond servant, my mind and heart was renewed with the truth that the bond servant has a love relationship with the master and can trust his life in his care.

So, I am Looking forward to the Beauty for Ashes support group with the hope and anticipation of receiving truth and spiritual strength to live a life that can face the tomorrow’s with God the father and I hope that you would consider joining the group also.

Lesson 1            

Do you love yourself?            

Do you like yourself? What three to five things do you like about yourself? What do you think and say about yourself?

They cannot be things you do such as good wife or mother etc. So often women became an extension of others. This is not to say I am a wife, mother, daughter, friend is bad but if your identity is just in what you do or someone in the natural then it is based in something that can fail.

Jesus said that we are “to love our neighbor as yourself.”  How can one love others if they do not love themselves?

How do we begin to love ourselves? I believe that God wants to heal people from self-hatred, insecurity, loneliness and so much more? But it starts with discovering truths. I realize that every person who reads this is not Christian, but I also know that in Christ is my identity. In him I am not flawed, damaged, or broken. Because he gives me a crown of beauty for ashes.

Although, men may also receive beauty for their ashes. I would like to encourage any man reading this to understand that you also are defined by Christ’s identity. God cares about all of us he created us to be in fellowship with him.

Typically, when our origins are unhealthy through abuse, neglect traumas, or shame we develop unhealthy issues, mindsets, and behaviors. But God is not restricted to how you were raised or what was done to you. He is in the restoration business. So, there is hope for all of us to be healed.

How we grew up is not the cause, it is the origin of our perceptions, reasoning and mindsets of events and people. Those are the areas that need truths, change and healing. Though things have been said or done towards you it does not mean you have to remain in shame, rejection or hurt any longer.

The reason I asked whether you like yourself is because it is the telltale sign of wherever you are mentally and emotionally.

Your homework for inner healing and developing healthy mindsets is:

Begin today to say good things about yourself. Write down 3-5 things you like and if you cannot, ask a person you trust to give you one. Then begin to say it to yourself daily. This will build you up internally. Give yourself slack if you cannot say it right away, then write it down. Keep a journal of your thoughts and homework with this page as we proceed with the lessons, I taught to the support group.

Lesson two

Gaining Confidence…

How did speaking good things to yourself make you feel? Did you sense more confidence as you went along each day speaking truths to yourself?

What is confidence? According to google: “1) the feeling or belief that one can rely on someone or something, firm trust 2) The state of feeling certain about the truth of something. 3) A feeling of self-assurance arising from one’s appreciation of one’s own abilities or qualities: Self-assurance.”

Confidence in God is beneficial, for we can place our lives and outcomes in His Hands-He is faithful. Proverbs 14:26 “In the reverent and worshipful fear of the LORD there is strong confidence, and His children shall always have a place of refuge.”

We can have confidence in the Word of God because it has proven to be true archeologically, historically and prophetically. Hebrews 4:12 “For the word of God is living and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the division of soul and spirit, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.”

Confidence as self-assurance occurs as we learn and develop in our knowledge, giftings, and talents. As we study in order to learn a career or position, we grow in confidence.  The ability to do anything you are unfamiliar with makes anyone anxious, but willing to try builds confidence.  

Kidshealth.org states, “Confidence means feeling sure of yourself and your abilities not in an arrogant way, but in a realistic secure way. Confidence is not about feeling superior to others, it is a quiet inner knowledge that your capable.  Confident people-feel ready for everyday challenges.” I like this statement.

We cannot build confidence when we are stagnant. However, we grow confidence while we take steps attempting new things or learning new ideas. Getting trained or teaching helps to achieve the goal of what you would like to learn or do.

Confidence is derived from the understanding in your mind you can, you will, and you will not stop.

Therefore, understanding the way you feel or think about yourself is so crucial.  If all your rehearsing in your mind remain negative statements of, “I won’t, I can’t, or I’ll never,” this just beats you down and prevents you from being confident to try. It’s time to say, “I will try, I can do it, I will do it.”

It is time to let God heal the hurt and things that drive you to put yourself down. You can be free to grow in confidence. Begin today to speak truths to yourself. You can learn and develop and build confidence within yourself.

Your homework for inner healing and developing healthy mindsets is to speak out loud, “I will try, I can do it, I will do it.” If speaking out loud is too difficult then write it down in your journal.

Lesson Three

Roots of Shame

Your homework for inner healing and developing healthy mindsets was to speak out loud, “I will try, I can do it, I will do it.” How did speaking those declarations empower you? Feel free to leave a comment or send me a private comment through Contact Me page link at the end of this lesson.

Roots of Shame

How is speaking the truth to yourself helping you? Sometimes when we can’t say good things about our self is due to the different unhealthy origins one being a root of shame. Roots become the same way as a stronghold it keeps you locked in. Today we are breaking strongholds of shame. Shame of how you think that the negative of yourself it true and shame of the abuses done to you are your fault.

Shame says in your thoughts “I’m bad.” It is a root formed in your thinking by initial experiences that are making you feel bad about yourself. The word shame in the dictionary as a noun means “a painful feeling of humiliation or distress caused by the consciousness of wrong or foolish behavior. As a verb it means “(of a person, action or situation) make (someone) feel ashamed.” ‘To humiliate, mortify, embarrass.’

When we internalize a shame of something being told or done to us it turns into a shame-based mindset (root/stronghold) of thinking I’m bad, I’m flawed or I’m damaged goods. This one goes deep into the psyche as well as the mind will think I’m flawed and feel ashamed.

Shame-based system in the dysfunctional families usually establish a secrecy about the family dynamics. Family are told what happens here remains here. Abusers will pose a threat to the victim to not talk about the abuse or else… this all leads to silencing a victim and internalizing them in the shame. This secrecy is the way in which abuse is held in internally. So that not only are they abused, either (physically, sexually, emotionally, verbally) they are hostage through shame to keep it in and not talk about it.

This all is leading to a life of shame internalized which means that it makes you think and feel ashamed of yourself. The reality is what was done to you was not your fault no matter what you have been told, a child/teen does not deserve abuse ever.

This root goes deep-rooted and through the power of God you can be healed and set free.  You can be free of the pain of an abuse.

Adults too can be abused this is also destructive to the individual physically, emotionally and psychology creating shame usually done in secrecy as well. I’m not a specialist in domestic violence even though I did go through Life Skills International educational program twice and learned enough to say, ‘God hates violence.’

In Isaiah 54:4 “Do not fear, for you will not be ashamed; neither be disgraced, for you will not be put to shame. For you will forget the shame of your youth…”

Through this Beauty for Ashes page we are going to look at things that are hard, but God will go through it with you.

God loves you unconditionally.  His love will bring us through as we look back at the past pain, it’s the doorway to freedom. We don’t remain in the doorway we walk through it.

But God wants us to know His love is tangible, powerful and unfailing. He will go through the pain with you and fill the space of pain with His healing love. So that you remain then rooted and become grounded in His love for you!

My prayer for you today is, that Our Heavenly Father wrap you in His loving arms and you begin to sense His unconditional love for you through Christ Jesus.  May He by His Holy Spirit quicken you to know He’s bringing you through whatever caused shame in your life and the shame is broken off of you now by the power of God in Jesus name. I pray you begin to sense freedom to love yourself and others.

Your homework for inner healing and developing healthy mindsets is journaling anything that you say negative about yourself then write a positive truth to replace it. A positive truth can be a scripture or statement. Also, if you were abused and have never spoken about it find a safe person to tell to get the pain out.

Example: I feel or think I’m alone -The truth is God is always with me.

https://insightsbydrannette.com/contact-me/ Any questions please feel free to contact me.

https://insightsbydrannette.com/ashes-in-our-lives/

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Your homework for inner healing and developing healthy mindsets was journaling anything that you say negative about yourself then write a positive truth to replace it. How has this helped you please feel free to contact me with a testimony on how this is helping you or any questions you may have. https://insightsbydrannette.com/contact-me/

Lesson Four

The Root of Rejection

Everyone faces rejection although some do not respond well to it. When you have a root of rejection it manages to override our perspective on situations. Have you ever stepped into a room and felt unaccepted or unseen? That is derived from the unhealthy roots of rejection.

What is rejection? According to Webster’s Dictionary: “rejection means 1) to refuse to accept, recognize, or make use of: Repudiate 2) to refuse to consider or grant: Deny 3) To ruse affection or recognition to (a person) 4) To throw away: discard” “syn: reject, decline, dismiss, refuse, spurn, turn down, Core meaning: v. To be unwilling to accept, consider or receive.”

When rejection is the root/stronghold in our minds and the heart it can produce a devastating impact on the psyche. Roots as well as their strongholds are developed early in life created by the trauma, abuses, neglect, abandonment etc. Anyone of these will be able to and do produce the root of rejection in an individual where they feel and believe no one likes or wants me. This root/stronghold clouds the person from believing their accepted, loved and cherished. One may even reject themselves from any number of reasons.

In the blog post “Rejection Connection” I gave three different ways people handle rejection. The third way is to identify it, let it out, forgive and move on. 

This post is information about the root of rejection. When we have a root of rejection our perceptions are cloudy. It’s harder and harder to see clearly that the rejection may not always be personal. Therefore, it is vital to get a healthy reality viewpoint from a trusted individual.

A root of rejection may be uprooted as well as healed by God. When we have the root/stronghold of rejection the fear of rejection is overwhelming.  God sent Jesus to defeat all our unhealthy roots and by His mighty name I uproot rejection and plant his seeds of unfailing love in your hearts and minds today.

My prayer for you today is, that Our Heavenly Father wrap you in His loving arms and uproot rejection and shame and you begin to sense His love and acceptance for you through Christ Jesus.  May He by His Holy Spirit quicken you to know He’s uprooting roots of rejection and healing whatever caused rejection in your life and the rejection is broken off of you now by the power of God and all fear of rejection is loosed off of you in Jesus name. I pray you begin to sense freedom to love and except yourself and others.

Your homework for inner-healing and developing healthy mindsets is to say to yourself you are accepted in Christ. God accepts you in Jesus and so do you.

https://insightsbydrannette.com/three-areas-of-rejection/

https://insightsbydrannette.com/the-rejection-connection/

Lesson Five

Shame…

What is shame? What are the three different kinds of shame? Why is it so important to be free of shame? These are some of the questions we will be looking at for answers.

Shame is a bad feeling about your personhood and the feeling of being flawed.  Shame based and toxic shame comes from three different types of shame.  Sandra D. Wilson stated in her book ‘Released from Shame.’  ‘There are three types of shame biological, biblical and binding.’ Shame is instilled by one or all these three types.

Let’s look at her three types of shame. The first is ‘biological shame.’ ‘Biological shame has the physical component.’ For instances I had been born with multi congenital abnormalities one being a bone illness that affected my growth plates. That’s what caused the major joints in my body in order not to form properly. I couldn’t walk good or run so as a kid I had severe pain in my legs, but the doctors didn’t know back then what disease I had until I was mush older.  I couldn’t participate in sports or gym either. It caused me to make me feel ashamed of my body because I turned out to be different. This is just one example of biological shame. God healed me from biological shame but will talk about that later.

You can feel biological shame from being short or tall, skinny or heavy. No matter what the circumstance is in our biological makeup which is different from other’s may cause shame especially if the individual is teased, bullied or doesn’t like to be different.

Getting bullied represents a biological and psychological shaming. I believe this is the reason why it’s so distressing and hard for the person being bullied they start to believe their defected as well as to it causes serious emotional and mental pain. If the harassment is also physical abuse it is at the same time damaging. This could cause psychological trauma for a child who will need healing.

The second type of shame in this book is ‘Biblical Shame.’ This has the spiritual component to the shaming. This occurs in religions and religious families that must be perfect and uphold a requirement higher than you can reach or obtain.

There’s a difference between a relationship between Jesus and being a spiritual person who performs the rules in order to feel good about themselves. God does not love you because you are performing well, he loves you for he is love.

There are groups, cults and religions that put shame on people to maintain them bound to a standard of acceptance for the groups, cults or religions traditions. There’s a difference between tradition and the Word of God.  When we present traditions as criteria as if they are the Word of God it can generate shame in people who are trying to keep the traditions. Because they feel they have failed if they can’t maintain them when it’s a man-made tradition.

The third type of shame in the book is ‘binding shame.’  ‘Binding shame has a psychological component.’ The term bound by the shame comes from childhood encounters in families that are dysfunctional.  Children do not accurately interpret their parent’s actions because they internalize every action or word by the parent as their own fault.

When a parent is dysfunctional themselves, they will place their shame onto their children by words, actions, body language and tones. For example, if your dubbed stupid as a child eventually you believe it.  This psychologically makes you think that you are unable to learn and that there’s something wrong with you and with who you are.

All three of these types of shame can produce a shame-based identity where you feel your identity is flawed, bad or worthless. When you have a shame-based identity you have a difficult time separating your opinions from who you are.

Getting liberated from shame is essential to living a non-dysfunctional life. Our identity remains rooted to the essence of our being.  If your identity remains rooted in a shame that you dislike yourself, you would not love yourself in a healthy way and your thoughts will strengthen the negatives about yourself it’s a sad place to live. If you can’t accept yourself, you are feeling and think others can’t accept you either.

The good news is that you can get free from shame. I know from my own experience God healed myself from the shame I felt regarding my disability. He freed me years back from feeling flawed.

How did I get free? I had to first confront the shame, hurt and pain. Through God I got the inner healing for all the pain of being unable to accomplish what I wanted to do and the feelings of being less. 

I had to change my thinking about the disability. It’s all right that I’m not able to run or walk far. It’s not a flaw it’s a disability. I had to embrace my physical restrictions and health issues by seeing them all through God’s eyes. There’s a scripture that God used to help me look at myself the way That He sees me beautiful and loved.

Song of Solomon 4:7 amp “[He exclaimed] O my love, how beautiful you are! There is no flaw in you!”

My prayer: Dear Heavenly Father as they give you the pain and shame, I pray you are replacing it with your unconditional love for them. That by the sacrifice of Jesus each pain, sorrow and shame be gone in Jesus name.

Your homework for inner-healing and developing healthy mindsets is to prayerfully read that scripture every day at least one to three times a day and say it out loud. Song of Solomon 4:7 amp “[He exclaimed] O my love, how beautiful you are! There is no flaw in you!”

Lesson Six

What are Strongholds and Roots?

What is a stronghold? Where are they erected? How do we pull them down? What is the difference between strongholds and roots?

The Holy Spirit spoke to me years ago “When there are bad roots in our lives such as rejection, shame, fears, etc. you have to first pull-down the stronghold protecting the root or roots, to be able to uproot the bad root’s so you then may be able to live in freedom.”

2 Corinthians 10:3-5 AMP “For though we walk (live) in the flesh we are not carrying on our warfare according to the flesh and using mere human weapons. 4) For the weapons of our warfare are not physical [weapons of flesh & blood] but they are mighty before God, for the overthrow and destruction of strongholds. 5) [In as much as we]refute arguments, theories, and reasonings and every proud and lofty thing that sets itself up against the [true]knowledge of God, and we lead every thought and purpose away captive into the obedience of Christ(the Messiah, the Anointed One.)”

What is a stronghold? I thought years ago the stronghold was the action, habits or behaviors that you can’t control but no that is just fruit. The stronghold is the thoughts, arguments, theories and reasonings we use to uphold and defend our actions, habits and behaviors. So, the real strongholds remain the beliefs, thoughts and views that validate our actions, habits and behaviors.

Thayer’s Greek English Lexicon “a stronghold is what one uses to fortify and defend a personal belief, idea or opinion against outside opposition. A Stronghold is the fortification around and defense of what you believe especially when you are wrong.”

I used to think a stronghold was a habit, action or addiction that you cannot stop on your own. But we must understand the action is just the fruit of the stronghold.

The stronghold is the thoughts, arguments, theories and reasonings we use to uphold and validate our actions, habits, behaviors.

Strong’s Greek Dictionary Stronghold: “To Fortify, through the idea of holding safely; a castle (fig: argument: stronghold)”

Webster’s Dictionary stronghold “1) a fortress 2) an area dominated or occupied by a special group”

Since we now know exactly what a stronghold is, we need to answer where are they, the answer is they’re in the mind and heart.

The mind is like a rudder to a ship it steers the body. We usually feel or think before we do. I’ve heard it said an addict relapses in their mind before they relapse physically. This statement lets you know how important your thoughts are.

Strongholds protect roots (the arguments, theories and opinions) that validate the behaviors or actions need to be removed so that the original ‘root problem’ can be dealt with. You can choose to change how you think but if the original (root problem) hurt, pain, or trauma is repressed then it will surface in all kinds of unhealthy behaviors, actions and attitudes etc.

Root “3) a support: base 4) an essential part or element: core A primary source or origin.” Roots “To become firmly settled or entrenched…”

God’s Word states in Jeremiah 1:10 “See, I have this day appointed you to the oversight of the nations and the kingdoms to root out and pull down; to destroy and over throw; to build and to plant.”

By the power of the Holy Spirit we are going to begin to pull down strongholds (the beliefs, theories, opinions and arguments that are contrary to God’s way & word) so that we can up-root bad and unhealthy roots (root problems) in our lives and then plant healthy seeds which will make healthy roots. The word of God is the seeds of truth we are going to sow and plant in our minds, hearts and lives.

Take a moment and look at your life where are you concerning acceptance? Do you feel accepted or are you struggling with feelings and thoughts of worthlessness? Do you speak well about yourself? If your answer is no, then it’s time to let the Holy Spirit show you what reasonings, theories, and opinions  (strongholds) that are validating your behaviors, actions, habit’s or addictions to medicate yourself to feel accepted. Or the words you are repeating in your head to continue to feel worthless. When we feel or think we are worthless it comes from a hurt, pain, trauma that must be healed.

Unhealthy roots (root problems) develop when we repress hurts, traumas or pain from our past. They can form into unhealthy ways of coping. All pain needs to be voiced when we deny hurt a voice, we push it down, but nothing stays down it always comes to the surface in ways that we least expect. These are the roots (root problem) that need to be healed.

My prayer for you: Dear Heavenly Father through your Holy Spirit uncover the strongholds (thoughts, theories and opinions) that are defending & validating the behaviors, attitudes or actions and I pray you heal each person reading this to feel accepted. Lord remove any blinders to the truth of who you are and bring clarity and healing to the pain and hurt that is causing unacceptance in Jesus name. Amen

Your homework for inner-healing and healthy mindsets is to proceed with speaking the scripture’s that are replacing the words of unacceptance with approval. I want you to find the scripture and message me with what scripture your mediating on and how it makes you feel accepted in Christ’s love.

Lesson Seven

Words that bring life or death…

Sept 28th, 2020 we relaunched Beauty for Ashes women’s support group. We had the group on zoom. This is the message I taught along with using ‘The God Therapy’ book written by Pastor Timothy Lane MA

Which words produce life, and which produce death? The words that produce life become words of a blessing. But if they produce death, they become word curses.

What is a word curse? It can be anything spoken to you, by you or about you concerning you and your life that you believe, and it is a negative, unloving, unkind or abusive statement. Usually they are spoken by an authority or parental figure and you believe what they said. When you repeat the statements with belief, they become your reality.

God speaks life over us not death. His word is filled with good things that are truths. It is essential to know who you are in Christ so that you can refute the lies of the enemy, yourself, others, or the world. Not everything spoken to us is beneficial to us. We need to recognize what is being spoken so we can refuse to believe any lies, wrong beliefs, or harmful words (word curses) spoken to us, or by us.

Proverbs 18:21 “Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit.”

Proverbs 18:7 “A fool’s mouth is his destruction, and his lips are the snare of his soul.”

Proverbs 18:20 “A man’s stomach shall be satisfied from the fruit of his mouth; from the produce of his lips he shall be filled.”

Numbers 14: 28 ” Say to them, As I live says the LORD, just as you have spoken in my hearing so I will do to you.”

Matthew 12: 36-37 “But I say to you that for every idle word man may speak, they will give account of it in the day of judgment. 37-For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.”

Your words are producing either blessings or curses. We eat of our words! that is powerful thought. So, for a minute think on your words lately and how they made you feel. What type of words are you speaking and thinking?

Remember as a man thinketh so is he. So, your thoughts are producing blessings and curses too. Usually what we think is what is coming out of our mouths. Jesus said out of our hearts our mouths speak. The heart and mind are connected. You cannot separate heart and mind. The mind is part of your soul, the soul is the mind, will and emotions. Your heart desires which is will so you can see how intertwined they are.

To be whole we must be willing to face uncomfortable things. Wholeness is essential to overcoming all obstacles. “Obstacles are things that block one’s way, prevents or hinders progress.”

Word curses block our way because they can be subconscious and undetected, they also can attract demonic interference. (‘Interference means the action of interfering or the process of being interfered with.’)

How do you get free of word curses, negative words spoken by you or to you, or inner vows you have made to live by which are destructive to live by?

We used the book the ‘God Therapy’ book by Timothy Lane MA. We followed his God Therapy steps in ‘breaking word curses and unhealthy beliefs.’ I highly recommend this book.

First you must identify the word curses or unhealthy beliefs. Take a moment close your eyes and ask the Lord to show you what negative words you are believing. He will tell you if you ask him.

Secondly invite Jesus to speak to you. We all hear differently some people sense God, some hear, some see, some feel. However, you encounter Jesus.

Ask him: Lord, what is the truth? Now wait and listen. Write down what you sense, hear, feel, or see.

“Ask Father God what healthy beliefs should you replace the unhealthy beliefs with?” Write it down

“Ask the Lord is there anything He wants to say to you.” Also write it down this will give you a point of reference. So that you will be able to say and know what negative beliefs were broken and what God had you replace them with. And whatever God spoke to you about. By writing it down will have a remembrance of it.

From His book I followed this prayer and with the leading of the Holy Spirit I improvised as lead by the Spirit. Thirdly, repeat this prayer.

“In Jesus name, I repent for accepting and believing these word curses. I break the power of these word curses and commit to no longer speaking and allowing these word curses to control my mind. I forgive everyone who has spoken these word curses over me, and I break the power of verbal abuse and command myself to be healed. In Jesus name, every impact these negative words have had on my emotions and identity I command freedom. In Jesus name I renounce these words, thoughts or vows and no longer partner with them.”

“In the name of Jesus, I command myself to be healed from every wound that has been created because of the words I and others have spoken over me.”

“I break the power, of these curses over my life and release blessings. Father, I commit to speaking and thinking only what your Word says, and I refuse to accept what the devil or people say about me.”

This is my prayer for you: In the name of Jesus I am breaking every word curse spoken over you or by you. I also break every power of demonic influence of word cruses off your life concerning any word curses, negative statements, and unhealthy belief’s you or anyone spoke to you in Jesus name. I command evet demonic spirit that had access from word curses to you mind, will, emotions, and body to come out and off you in Jesus name. I release blessings into those areas of your life were there was a curse is now a blessing. Amen

If you prayed this prayed and received inner healing and deliverance refill your mind and heart with the word of God. Praise Jesus for the healing and deliverance.

Have you checked your tongue lately?

Contact Dr. Annette

April 27th, 2021 Tonight is the first in person and zoom Beauty For Ashes women’s support group meeting since we relaunched during the pandemic. If you are interested in attending please contact me to receive the link. We will cover this topic and address area’s from Pat Springle’s Book ‘A Christian Perspective Codependency.’

Lesson Eight

Where does your value come from?

What is a mirror? “it is a reflective surface, now typically of glass coated with a metal amalgam that reflects a clear image.”

To me it is a device to see oneself. When you look in a mirror what do you see? If I asked you to name three things you like about yourself, but you cannot answer what you do or say I’m a good wife, mother… How would you answer then? Think on this for a minute.

This is a message I taught on at the woman’s bible study at our church. The question the Holy Spirit asked remains “Where are you getting your worth from?” This is an important statement to think on… These two definitions explain where our worth is coming from in the natural.

“Self-worth is the internal sense of being good enough and worthy of love and belonging from others.”

“Self-worth is often confused with self-esteem. Self-esteem relies on external factors such as success & achievements.”

Your Worth equals value and comes from Your Identity in ChristJesus is my identity!!! My value and worth come from Him.

I do not have to work it, make it or maintain it. I just live, walk, and abide in Christ Jesus because He worked it and died for it. I live, laugh and love in Him.

God recreated-regenerated into us a new spirit when we were born again, we became a part of the new Adam the nature of Christ. Your spirit man was recreated in the image of Christ, but our soul & body is what gets in our way.  Your soul is working out its salvation with fear and trembling.  But we have a choice to choose to activate our will and choose to live and walk in our identity in Christ.  In His Righteousness, sanctification, redemption and dominion.

1 Corinthians 1:3 “But of Him you are in Christ Jesus, who became for us wisdom from God-and righteousness and sanctification and redemption.”

I live in Him, He lives in me, we are one in Jesus! Just as he prayed, we would be. John 17:20-21 “I do not pray for these alone, but also for those who will believe in Me through their word 21) that they all may be one, as You, Father, are in Me, and I in You; that thy also may be one in Us, that the world may believe that You sent me…”

Since our identity is in Christ Jesus what does that mean. I looked the word identity up online, “The word Identity means 1) a: the distinguishing character or personality of an individual: Individuality b) The relation established by psychological identification 2) the condition of being the same with something described or asserted established.”

“The deeper meaning: the definition of identity is who you are, the way you are viewed by the world and the characteristics that define you. such as a person’s name…”

What exactly does Jesus’ identity mean for, a believer. It is who we are and how God sees us.

Since we now know our identity is in Christ Jesus then how do we live, walk, and abide in Him?

And that is the reason why the Apostle Paul could say ‘he no longer lives.’

Gal 2:19-20 “For I through the law died to the law that I might live to God. 20)I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ live in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.”

We live by faith in Christ we live by his accomplishments not our own. We live through his power, anointing and grace. This is the reason why Paul could also ‘endure all things through His grace which is sufficient.’ The Apostle Paul pleaded to have the thorn in his flesh removed. Theologian’s debate what the thorn was either an eye disease or the continuous assault on him as he traveled preaching the gospel either way Jesus did not remove it and after the third pleading of prayers the Holy Spirit spoke. In 2 Corinthians 12:9 “And He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.”

Therefore, we live by the Grace of God. John 1:16 “And of His fullness we have all received, and grace for grace…” Jesus came full of grace and gave us grace. It’s His grace for grace so you are able to live in His grace. Which is His strength for what you face each day.

2 Corinthians 3:18 “But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as by the Spirit of the Lord.”   As you live in Him you will reflect His glory.

We can live, abide and walk in and through Christ Jesus…

Abiding in Him can & ought to be a spiritual supernatural occurrence of continuance. The word abide means “stay, remain, abide, rest, sojourn, persist, pursue.” This is applied by abiding continually.  John 15:4 “Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in Me.”

That is why when they were in the boat with Jesus, they got afraid. Because their eyes and mind where on the natural boat and water. Even though they were in the boat with him they were not abiding in him. When he woke up, he said ‘ye of little faith.’ Their faith was on the wrong thing.  This is just one example of why our identity must be in Him. Apart from Him we can do nothing.

We can live, abide, and walk in our identity in Jesus.

How do you walk in your identity with Jesus? 1) Walk Humbly with God meaning total dependence on God for everything. Even our own hearts, because our hearts can deceive us, into a religious routine of thinking we are ok, when we are not, so staying humble also keeps us in check. Regularly let God search your heart. Micah 6:8 “He has shown you, o man what is good; And what does the LORD require of you but to do justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God?”

2) The bible says we are to walk by faith not sight. What does ‘walk by faith’ mean to you? Whose faith are you walking in? We each got a measure of faith where did it come from? Jesus! We all have his faith; we grow in it. He is the author and perfector of our faith. Hebrews 12:2 “looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.”

Romans 12:3” “…God has dealt to each one a measure of faith. We walk by faith and not by sight by depending on and in Jesus. When you know your real identity is in Jesus, that is when you know who accepts you is Almighty God. Keeping your eyes, mind, heart soul and body on Christ Jesus because you are his and he is yours.

The word of God is truth it produces faith. Faith comes from hearing the Word of God. The Word of God is a mirror to see who you are in Christ.  

Anxiety is fear, fear is an enemy. We become anxious because our eyes go on us it opens us up to fear. Our eyes, mind, heart must stay on Jesus. His identity is ours and we live, abide and walk in Him through Him. You are not alone!

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